


The Start To The Beginning

by DarkWolf3030



Series: Life As We Know Hamilton AU [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Drinking, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, Family, Fluff, Gay, Gay Sex, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Past Child Abuse, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-22
Updated: 2018-04-19
Packaged: 2019-03-08 00:12:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 10
Words: 26,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13446399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkWolf3030/pseuds/DarkWolf3030
Summary: Before the story of Alex and John was a different story altogether.This is a story about two immigrants with no home, a boy destined to take over his father's business, a sick boy who just wants to live, a young man who is running from his fears and a kid who just wants to be anything but who he is told he has to be.This is a story about all of them.





	1. The start

*John*  
I pulled my one suitcase with me on its spinning wheels while struggling to carry my stuffed duffle bag up the paved path. This was it I told myself marching up the steps of the college. I was finally away from my father. I was never going back, or at least until Christmas. As much as I wanted to rebel I had to pay my tuition somehow. 

My steps lost their confidence and I slowed down at the thought of my father. I stopped to take a deep breath, one to ground myself. The September air blew me the scent of freshly trimmed grass and teen hormones. The campus was as beautiful as the pictures. Trees dotted the landscape and I had never seen greener grass or a brighter sun back home. New York wasn't what I had pictured which was fine with me seeing as my idea of new york had a lot more homeless people in it. 

I stared up at the large school. This was truly it and it filled me with dread. I didn't have a single friend going here. I didn't even know anyone living in the state. New York was going to chew me up and spit me out and I didn't blame it, I was easy like that.

I got moving again, not wanting to miss getting settled in. There were three days at the beginning of the semester set aside for kids to get there. My flight happened to be on the last day which meant my classes started in the morning. My stomach did a flip at the thought of it.

I looked to all the kids as I passed. These people were my peers and this was a huge school. So many people, my brain panicked. What if they don't like me? Is that girl whispering about me? Why is that boy staring at me? Am I wearing a shirt? Shit, what if I looked weird. Oh god oh god oh-

I was knocked to the floor before I could finish my panic attack.

“OH MY GOD!” A brightly colored girl rushed to help me back up. “I am soooo sorry,” she apologized, rapid fire. “ I should have been more careful! I am such a clutz!”

“It's fine,” I assured her. “I wasn't paying attention either.” 

She grinned wide and stuck out a hand once I was back on my feet. “Martha Manning,” she introduced.

I shifted my bag around. “John,”I told her shaking her hand.

“Well John,” her speech had slowed back down to one of a normal person’s. “it was nice to meet you but I've gotta run. See you around.”

“Yeah,” I yelled back. I got quiet when I realized she wasn't there to hear the rest of what I had to say. “See you around.” I sighed, picked up my bag, and made it the rest of the way to my room without much more incident.

I now stood outside the off-white door with ‘floor B Room 27’ on it in brass letters. I was excited and terrified. I didn't know what to expect and that made it a little fun. I twisted the dull round handle and walked into the room. It was small but liveable and the best part it was far from my father which made it better than home already. It was to be mine.

Half the room already had the bed made with silver sheets. There was a suitcase next to the bed meaning my roommate is already here. I took a moment to try to see what kind of person he was. My biggest clue was hanging on the wall, a gay pride flag. I felt a part of me let go of a bit of stress. At least I wasn't alone there. At least I would get beat up by him for how I am. Not even my own family knew I was gay yet. As far as my father knew I was a straight male who was going to marry beautiful women. That asshole.

I set my bag on the empty bed and got my green sheets from my duffle bag. I made quick work of the bad and took advantage of the desk that each side had. I unpacked the few art supplies I took with me. Seven drawing pencils, one erase, a sketchbook and an expensive pack of colored pencils. It was good enough, I would get more while I was here.  
“Are you an artist?” I jumped at the new voice, hitting my leg on my chair. I almost went backward but I caught myself on the edge of the table.

“Sorry man. I didn't mean to scare you. I'm your roommate.” I nodded my head, still a bit dazed. The man was bigger than I was with a broad chest and strong limbs he could probably bench press me without an issue. His short cut hair was hidden under his silver beane. “I should have warned you that I entered the room,” he apologized biting back laughter

“No, no it's fine I was just...somewhere else.”

“I know what you mean. It is insane inst it? First time at college, never thought I would see it.”

I let out a shaky laugh. I nearly threw up on the plane.

“Plane huh.” He sat down on his bed and I took a seat on mine. “Where are you from?”

“South Carolina. It's a fun place if you never go there.”

He laughed at my joke. “Guessing you didn't like it.”

“That doesn't even cut it. What about you?”

“Born in Ireland and raised everywhere but.”

“Interesting,” I sat forward a bit, resting my elbows on my knees. “What was Ireland like?”

“I wouldn't really know. I was still a baby during the move. My father was a marine that was needed in a lot of places.”

“That's amazing.”

“Eh, it's not the best life but it's my life. It gave me experiences and a cultural difference that colleges just eat up. That's how I landed an almost free ride. “

“Almost?”

“It's enough money to almost pay for everything but I've got what I need for the rest. It's a no sweat deal for me especially looking at what I'm taking.”

“What are you here to major in?”

“Dual majoring in phycology and design,” he said proudly.

“Those are two different things.”

“The heart wants what the heart wants. What about you?”

“Biology teacher.”

“Weirdo.”

“Hey what about The heart wants what the heart wants?”

“I never said it was a smart heart.”

“That's dumb,” I grunted.

He shrugged and smiled. “Let me see your schedule.”

*Alex*

“I think that we should have pack more clothes,” Laf told me frowning at our unzipped bag. He had four shirts and two pairs of pants. It wasn't very much. We had to take clothes that we could both wear so that meant it had to fit him and I had to deal.

“I don't think you owned much more than that besides we need room for the laptop.” I finished making my bed and moved to take out the hunk of junk my foster family gave us. I moved it out of the bag and onto the desk on my side of the room to plug it in. 

“But still, je regrette mes choix.”

“Hey, no talk like that. We are doing just fine.”

“Non, you have no clue.” He pulled off the shirt he was wearing that still wreaked of the clunker car we drove here in. He replaced it with a hoodie of his. I was wearing one of his other hoodies and the only pair of pants that fit me.

We were both in our new shared room despising the colorless walls and curtainless windows. It was no matter as long as I had Laf. I had figured out that if you bribe a few people you can pick your roommate. The obvious choice was my friend from high school. Laf and I were trying to settle in but with nothing to really take with us it wasn't much of settling in as it was getting depressed. Digging through our bag reminded us both of how fucked we were at young ages. Laf had been an orphaned exchange student from France, his foster family only cared a little. I was an orphan child from the Caribbean. My family cared a lot but that didn't mean they had a lot of money.  
He pushed his bag aside and laid facing me on the sheets the school had provided. We didn't even have enough money for sheets. It was a sad world.

“peut-être que nous aurions dû rester en Virginie.” He was saying what I felt but we had to rise up. No one was going to keep us down.

“Nous avons fait le bon choix. If we don't try then all we will ever be is the orphans in that one high school. Remember how we used to get teased?” He nodded his head trying not to cry. “It won't be like that. No one here knows us, college boys are going to love your accent. You will be the star of the school. And I will be top of my class-”

“-Alex-”

“Non. As long as we are in it together we will be fine. I'm telling you this is our big break. This is the start of our lives. Agreed?”

He sat up, drying his eyes with his sleeve. “You're right. This will be very different.”

“There ya go.” I stretched and threw a look at our door. “Wanna go explore?”

“Do I have any say?”

“Not even a little.” 

“Then I must go. Only to keep you out of trouble though.”

“Sure sure,” I grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him with me to see what there is to see.  
\---  
The campus didn't compare to the beauty of Virginia. I already missed the spring sky and colored trees in fall. One thing I would definitely miss was the mild winters. I might freeze to death here.  
Maybe we should stop by a thrift store I told him. Try to get some warmer clothes. I shivered as a breeze past right through me. 

“With what money,” he pointed out. “We are broke. We wouldn't be able to take classes if it was not for scholarships.”

“I know. Maybe I should get a job,” I offered watching ripples on the water of the lake.

“Non. Law school will take it out of you. I will look around for one. Maybe a coffee shop on campus will hire me.”

“With that accent, anyone will hire you.”

“I am cute. That is true. You look like a gremlin and scare away customers.”

I shoved him playfully. “Maybe I should just push you into a lake. A tall guy like you will just roll.”

“You love me too much to do that. Besides small one like you, i could just throw.”

“Perhaps,” I walked away from him.

“Perhaps what? Petit lion, what do you mean? “

I smiled to myself as he caught up. I had dragged him around the school but with all the moving in going on, there wasn't much to do. We ended up on a path around a lake. The water had been the star of the brochure from the school. It, unlike the rest of the school, did not look better in person. Laf loved it though, he enjoyed the many flowers still in bloom from winter.

“Many colors,” he mused as we walked. “I enjoy the, ah what is the word. The odder?”

“The fragrance?”

“Oui, that is it. I enjoy the fragrance. Ah, I wonder what spring in the loud city will look like.”

“Hopefully not too bright.”

“This is why you are a gremlin.”

“This is why you're getting hit with a wet towel tonight.”

“That would be a threat if we had towels. “

I pinched the bridge of my nose.”I'll put that on the list.”

*Thomas*

“Death...despair...darkness…...death.”

“You already said that one.”

“Its what's on my mind.” Laying on your back during the morning is usually a great thing. Playing ‘depressing words that start with a certain letter’ with your roommate is even better. What's not great is that we were both woken up early by kids moving in for the first day of classes tomorrow. 

“I'm running out of words. M,”I told him. It was dark in the room, so dark that I couldn't see him as he thought about his answer. I usually kept the windows covered so we both couldn't see any sunlight, we both liked it better that way. He also was a little sensitive to light.  
There was another loud bang on my side of the room. “Murder, massacre, mutilation, cold.”

“That last one was a C.”

“It was more of what I'm feeling than anything.”

“Oh, want to come lay over here?”

“Yes.” There was some rustling from his end before I saw the shape of a very small person standing up. I lifted the edge of my comforter and he slid in, immediately cuddling into me. The bare chill of his chest on mine was no longer a shock, this was not the first time we had done this. After knowing each other for two years in high school and our freshman year of college it was pretty routine. 

“How are you feeling,”I asked. Another thing that I had taken up as a part of my day. I asked him how he was feeling about a thousand times a day, according to him.

“Just a little nervous for tomorrow.” 

“You're going to blow them away baby. You're so much smarter than  
the rest of these honkies.”

“If you love me than you'll never use that term again.”

“Don't be a honkie.”

“I don't think it was in context that time.”

“You're not in context.”

“Your not a context. W” I kissed the top of his head and tried to think depressing thoughts. It was hard with my boyfriend hugging me

“Waking, wasting, whales.”

I felt his frown and look up at me. “How are whales sad?”

“They can only live in water. Plus how do they have sex in water?”

“I don't know. I'm not a whale expert.”

“Now I'm curious about it. I would google it but re-enacting one sounds much better.” I played with the hem of his pants, stealing a quick kiss before he pulled back.

“Don't you even think about it.” He attempted to push my hand away but I just grabbed it and intertwined our fingers.

“Too late,” I kissed his nose. “ I'm already imagining you naked and-”

“I don't want to hear about your fantasies.” He pulled his hand away with a huff. 

“You're right let's make them a reality,” I purred. He shivered when I moved, letting in the cold against his back. I wiggled my tall self down far enough to pull him in for a soft kiss. I kept one hand lightly on his hip and my other on under my head as a makeshift pillow seeing as I pushed mine away in the night. 

“Thomas, we really shouldn't.” Yet he kissed me again, squirming when I didn't move the hand on his hip. 

“Oh, but James,”I squeezed his ass making him jump slightly. “We really should.” I fit my mouth over his once more. I let my hand go up his back, tracing out patterns on his dark skin. He moaned softly at the pure contact in a way that really got me going. 

After a few minutes of a lazy make out session, he got frustrated with my teasing. He shifted from his side to straddle my hips trying to take control of the situation. He came back down for a demanding kiss, his hands planted firmly on my chest as he did. 

As much as I was enjoying having him straddle me I knew I would love to hear him even more. With in inward grin, I forced my thigh between his leg to push up on his hard cock. He broke away from my mouth just to moan. I kept it up enjoying every sharp intake from him once he buried his head in the crook of my neck. 

I was getting hard from the image of him in my head. I didn't need the lights to be on to know how gorgeous he looked right now. At some point I wasn't even moving anymore he was just desperate enough to keep going on his own. God, it was so easy to get him like this, all hot and bothered, trying to keep his noise levels down. I, on the other hand, want more delicious sounds. His breath picked up as he continued and I knew that once that soft whine entered his voice that he was close. I switched the positions on him last minute, keeping his hips against the bed with one hand. He was too small to fight back so he whined instead.

“Thomas,” he complained his voice was husky and chopped up as he fought to catch his breath.

“Yes my dear James?” I kissed his collarbone and bare chest, I sucked a hickey on the collarbone before moving lower with a trail of kisses. “Is there something you would like to say?”

“I-,” he cut himself off with a soft. “Fuck” during his actions his sweatpants had slipped down his hips, I used that to my advantage. I licked along his sharp hip bone, I brought myself further down, my hand palming him still. 

I forced his hips back down when he tried to buck up into my hand. “What was that? I didn't catch the whole thing.”

“You're-you're satan.”

“You have wounded me with your words,” I grinned sitting up to pull off my shirt and threw it aside, glad to finally start undressing. He almost moved, without my hand on his hip he almost moved but stopped instead. He didn't want to leave now. I had him right where I wanted him so I took my time to drink in the sight of him laying spread out for me. Lips swollen and his cock hard with need. I pulled off his sweatpants slowly as he panted. 

“Thomas,” he breathed out, wiggling under my eyes as I admired him once again. God, i loved days like this.

I smoothed over his soft skin with my hand. “What is it, baby?” I leaned over him to suck a mark his neck. I loved to do that, I wanted the world to know that I was the lucky winner of James Madison. 

“I need-i,” his words were being lost in pleasure and embarrassment. He whimpered as I stood I kicked off my own pajama bottoms next I got of his boxers. With a hum I slid my hand down his stomach, stopping just above his leaking cock. “Hm, you can do better than that. Come on baby, it's only me.” His chest moved with each breath as he struggled to find words. God, he was so fucking hot. 

“I need you-you to fuck me,” he pleaded. “Please. Or anything. I just need to come.”

“So polite.” I moved my hand down all the way, gripping him tightly and using long strokes. He arched his back, mouth open and eyes screwed tight. 

"Thomas," he moaned. “God Thomas, please.”

"You're so fucking beautiful baby." He shuddered when my words and hot breath moved over him. “I shouldn't be this lucky, yet I am.” I used my other hand to stroke myself. It wasn't my favorite way to get off. On any normal day, i would fuck him into the bed but I didn't have any lube and I wasn't going to risk hurting him.

He breathed, caught in a crossfire of a moan. "Thomas," he struggled out right before he came on my hand. That was all I needed to finish myself. I peppered his face with kisses as he caught his breath. “You were so perfect baby,” I praised trying to ease his embarrassment. I got one last kiss from him before I rolled to the side and got a towel from our bathroom. 

He had an arm thrown over his eyes in pure humiliation when I came back. “Do you think anybody heard,” he asked weakly, still trying to get air into his lungs.

“It's college,” I told him as I finished wiping everything up. “If anyone heard they won't care.” I threw the towel in the laundry bin. I laid back down and pulled his arm away. “It's nothing to be worried about.”  
“I hope you're right,” he told me resting his head on my chest. “You're evil.” 

“I know baby, and you're angelic. That's why we get along so well.”


	2. Coffee And Red bull

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who in their right mind mixes coffee with energy drinks?

*Lafayette*  
I was very tired when my alarm went off but as usual when i tried to hit snooze someone had already turned it off. That someone was a sleep deprived over caffeinated idiot who was laying on top of me.

“Laf! Get up! Classes! Come on!”

“If you say one more thing,” I threatened sleepily, “I will skin you.”

“Try me,” he dared. I could hear his confident smile. 

I jumped up, throwing all my force forward. He went tumbling to the floor with a yelp. “Tractor,” he groaned up at me.

“You mess with the Frenchman and you get hurt.” I pushed my blanket off of me and let it fall on Alex while i stood up to stretch. I took a quick glance over to where the laptop sat, open and humming surrounded by a graveyard of muffin wrappers and coffee cups from the mess hall.

“What were you looking at all night?” I didn't bother to question the coffee part.

“I was googling professors and good places to get cheap clothes.” Petit lion was a terrible fooler, I could always see past what he was saying but I also wasn't going to push for something if he wasn't going to tell me.

“Both smart ideas,” I smiled. “What is the first class?”

“It's the one history class we are being forced to take,” he answered wrapping up in the brown blanket.

“I forgot about that.” Alex had thrown a fit about it on the ride to the campus. 

“Ugh, I don't want to take it. Why do I need to know about some dead guys?”

“To be educated. Do not worry, there will be plenty of writing for you to do I am sure.”

“That's what I'm afraid of.”

“Petit lion are you feeling alright? You love writing.”

“Not for history. I'm going to make history one day, I don't want to write it.”

“It's college mon ami. Do not overthink it.”

“I will over think what I want.”

I tilted my head down to meet his eyes. “I do not get paid nearly enough to deal with you.” I stepped over him to quickly change my pants.

“You don't get paid at all,” he giggled, averting his eyes. 

“That is the problem, is it not?” He got up to his feet and pulled on one of the bigger shirts. We did not bother to go to the restroom to change anymore, not after being best friends for so long. This was not the first time we had done this.

“I can make this work, right?” He pulled at the extra parts of the shirt. The fabric that was very tight on me hung off him. There was no in between for us.

“Maybe tie it in a knot? Like the guitar singers.”

“Country singers,” he supplied still tugging at the plain blue shirt

“Oui that is the people.” I pulled all my books together and watched him fuss over his looks. 

“Those are usually girl’s Laf,” he sighed. There was something wrong with him. I could tell that. He wobbled a bit on his legs. I ignored it, this had to be a caffeine crash.

“You can pass as one,” i shrugged. He threw me a glare and placed the hoodie he wore to bed in the dirty laundry pile we were staring in the corner of the room. 

“We have to get money soon, he told me typing a few more things on the laptop.

“I will poke around today and see if anyone is in need of an extra hand. They have to love the Frenchman.”

“Oh, they will Laf.”

I glanced back at the clock and picked up my books, shoving our one backpack his way. “You should take that.”

“You're going to need a bag.”

“Don't be an idiot, your law books are much bigger than mine. I am strong, I will be fine. Take the bag.”

“Marqu-”

“Take it now.” I picked it up and held it in front of him till he took it.

“We’ll get you a bag soon. I promise.” He hit one more button and snapped the laptop shut. He double checked his bag before we moved out of the room towards the lecture hall. It was only after a few minutes after getting there that i realized i had lost the Petit Lion.

*John*

All i wanted was to sit and think about the crap morning i had. I threw up eggs that i ate but so did my roommate so we bonded over scrubbing our floor clean. We ended up using and entire can of Febreze to wash away the smell. 

I had really taken a liking to the man called Hercules. He was a chill guy. After comparing schedules we noticed that we both had two of the same classes. A mandatory history class in the morning and a science lab every day but Friday. Once our introductions yesterday were out of the way we hung out, walking down a few streets and grabbed dinner at a burger joint. I threw the remainder of that up as well. 

I was sitting next to Hercules in the lecture hall now. He was trying to play cool and confident but i could see his leg bouncing up and down under the table. He was just as nervous as i was but i was the one showing it.

I was about to open my mouth to start a conversation the he looked very welcome to when someone crashed down in the seat next to me. I expected to see someone big and weighed a lot in order to cause a disturbance like he did, instead it was just a man my size staring and the long desk in front of him.

His eyes showed signs of sickness, as did the rest of him. He opened his mouth and immediately gagged but still got out a few words. “Hey, Laf is it good to mix red bull and coffee?”

“Who is Laf-”

His head hit the desk without an answer.

“Is he alright,” Hercules asked looking over my shoulder. 

“I don't think so.” I patted him on the back. “Hey, are you okay?”  
There was no answer. All red flags went up the biggest one being that this kid just committed suicide in front of me.

“Is he even alive,” Hercules asked in a nonchalant manner.  
I reached over and pressed to fingers to the pulse point on his neck. A rapid heart race pushed back against my finger.

“He's alive...for now. He must have had too much caffeine for his size.”

“Alex there you are,” a thick French accent snorted. I looked up to the tall man who was oblivious to Alex’s condition. 

“Uh, I think he's sick,” I told the Frenchman.

“Sick? Petit lion was fine in the room.” The large man placed a hand on Alex’s shoulder with slight concern.

“He-he said something about red bull and coffee then passed out. I don't know what happened.” 

The Frenchman's smile quickly died at the corner of his lips. “I will kill him once he wakes.” He hauled the surprisingly still conscious boy out of his seat and kept him standing with one arm around his shoulders. “I swear to all that is holy,” he muttered. “I turn my back on you and you go and die. Putain d'idiot.”

I didn't know what to say or do besides silently thank everything that the hall was still full of moving bodies so they didn't draw attention to themselves.

“Should we follow them,” I asked Hercules who was still watching the path they took to leave

“No,” he said hesitantly. “he seems like he knows him. I'm guessing that was Laf.”

I went quiet then asked, “Who in their right mind mixes coffee with energy drinks?” 

*Alex*

It was not Laf i had sat down next to i realized when the question i had already forgotten left my mind. This stranger's eyes held mine as i slowly felt my heart quit it's job. I felt pain when my head his the desk, i heard speech but i couldn't make it out through my heart pounding in my ear.

Freckles I thought. He had so many cute little freckles. They reminded me of the stars full of beauty and as much mystery as this boy now held in my heart. 

Through all the noise i was able to make out Laf’s voice and weight of his hand on my shoulder. Soon i was being lead, my vision blurry and legs useless, to the junk car we drove.  
\---  
I noticed first when i woke up that i was hooked up to an EKG machine. The movements of the lines reached high spikes often and quickly. I didn't know a lot about hospitals or health but i was pretty sure that it was bad. My entire body felt weighed down and my heart felt like it had run a marathon. I went back through my memories but i came back with nothing. 

Where was i? How did i get here? I felt a little flutter in my stomach. Oh god how old am i? Goosebumps rose on my skin as i dug. Last time i was in a hospital i had been 10 years old, i was sick but still alive. It was my mother who didn't make it. 

I shook my head. If i had the memory of that event then that was the past, right? Where was i on my own timeline? I faced my blurry vision to the empty guest chairs. Where was Laf?

While i was trying to figure out where i was my heart rate had risen to a dangerous level. Two nurses jogged into my room.

“Are you alright,” the one in purple asked when she noticed I was awake. The green clothed other messed around with the beeping machine.

“I-iam,”I told her. My voice shocked me as it came out slurred and slammed together. “Wheream I?”

“Patient,” is still incoherent she told the other. 

“Let's try some anesthesia. Maybe he’ll stay under longer that way.”

“Longer? ma’am how many times-” I stopped my thoughts to just stare at the needle in my arm, almost like I didn't know how to react. 

“Ihate,” shots I told them still confused.

Just rest the one in green told me heading to the door followed by the one in...i forget the color. Where am I?

*Lafayette*

I was mad at Alex, that was for damn sure but it was very funny to watch him try to communicate to the nurses through the window in the hall. This was the seventh time he had woken up scared and confused and the same thing happened every time. 

They continue to deny me access to the room because I am not family. I was pissed, to say the least, but now the staff was getting what they deserved. 

He's not incoherent i told the two men when they came back out still amused that Alex thought they were women. He's speaking French. It was a stretch to call that french but his spaced-out mind was trying. I could understand him yet it seemed the staff didn't care. Despite what others think based off his skin color French was his first language. His mother taught him it and English at the same time. I believe that was why he was a genius.

“Sir,” the one in purple started glancing back at the other nurse who pressed their lips into a fine line. “Sir,” purple said again. “You can go home. The patent is okay and the hospital will take good care of them.”

“You act like i found him on the road. Alexander, that is his name, is my Meilleur ami. On top of that i am his ride back to campus.”

Purple gave green a look of need when no help came the boy turned back to me. “We are thankful that you brought him in but we will be calling his emergency contact to pick him up when he is released.”

“I can save you the trouble. I am the emergency contact you speak of. I am how do you say...an honorary brother.”

“You two,” a different nurse yelled coming down the hall. “Leave Mr. Gilbert alone and find something more useful to do.”

“Angelica-” green started. 

“Now!”

They both scrambled to get away as Ms. Angelica approached.

“I am so sorry about those two. They are apart of a program used with the college.” She flicked a loose strand of hair from her face. “Allow me to introduce myself. I am the head nurse, Schuyler.”

“It is very nice to meet someone friendly, Nurse Schuyler.”

“Yes well, i do apologize for not coming to meet you sooner. I was busy trying to find out more about Alexander. I was hoping you could supply me with more information.”

“Of course. I would like to make sure he gets good care. What for?”  
She smiled sweetly and opened a folder in her hands. “When i came into work today and heard that there was a boy brought in from drinking red bull and coffee i was concerned. After taking a look into the vital signs my worries only grew. He has very high blood pressure from someone so young, I'm guessing that is from too much coffee.”

“It must be. Petit lion has had several cups a day since he and I met at 13 years old.”

She jotted a note down on a paper. “Mr. Gilbert i want you to understand how lucky Mr. Hamilton is that no damage to his heart on brain occurred today. He is much too small to be intaking that much caffeine. I also think you should be aware that he is underweight about 30 pounds.”

“Merde”

She looked up, “so you grasp how bad this is?”

“I do. I apologize for cursing in the presence of a lady.”

“I take no offense. I curse in french all day.”

“I am glad to know another person that speaks the language.” I paused to look in on Alex. The machines beeps were slowing down. “What am I to do about him?”

“Does he eat all three meals?”

“No, he only eats dinner on occasion I can get him to eat lunch but that is a fight I never have the energy for.”

“I see. Do you know why he doesn't eat breakfast?”

“It makes his stomach hurt.”

“What about lunch?”

“When we were in high school he skipped lunch so he could spend time in the computer lab, typing up papers to mail in.”

“He's a workaholic?”

“The textbook define. He has always had a thing for learning and working. It is his cup of tea.”

"More like coffee in this case," she joked lightly. I think you should try to get him to eat lunch for now on. Nurse’s orders, or else next time he pulls a stunt like this he might end up in a far worse condition.” One of the boys appeared at the end of the hall, calling for her.

“I'm coming,” she told them. “It was nice to meet you Mr. Gilbert.”

“Please just call me Lafayette.” 

“Alright then, Lafayette. I'm sure I will see you soon based on his records.”

“I am sure as well.” She gave me one more smile and went off leaving me to watch over Alex like I had done for years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter 2 everyone


	3. Girl Gang (And James)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and burr struggle while John dreams of the boy who almost died next to him.

*James*

Both years of my college career I had to wake up earlier than Thomas and every day without fail he would lay stretched out on his bed watching me with a goofy grin. 

“It's not polite to stare,”I told him tugging on my pants. 

“It is when you're staring at art.”

I turn to him, hands on my hips. He is still grinning, the blanket had pulled down far enough for me to see his toned stomach. I could feel blood rush to my face as his grin only grew.

“Like what you see, baby?”

“Shut up. Stop looking at me like that. Put on a shirt.”

“You act like you're a virgin and haven't seen me naked.” 

“You act like you want to sleep alone tonight.”

“I sleep alone every night.”

“Maybe if you stop pushing me off the bed in the middle of the night you wouldn't be so lonely.”

“I apologize like three times!”

I rolled my eyes and went back to getting ready. "Pants, check. Shirt, check. Bag, packed. Shoes," I looked around.

“Thomas?”

“Yeah baby,” he yawned

“Have you seen my shoes?”

“Mm, bathroom I think.” 

“Why are they-whatever.” I retrieved my shoes and pulled those on then went back to my list. Shoes, check. Water bottle, filled. “I think that's it,” i said to a sleepy Thomas who had a soft smile.

“You forgot pills he reminded me.”

“Shit that's right.” I got my pill box from my night stand and swallowed the two for morning. I could hear Thomas unlocking his phone as i moved around when i was done i turned back to him. 

“You ready to go,” he asked sitting up and swinging his long legs over the side to touch the ground.

“As ready as I'll ever be on a first day.” I rolled my shoulders and reached for the nob.

“What, no goodbye kiss?” I stopped and glanced back at him. He was standing now and there was the goofy grin again. The same one that made me fall for him. I kept my head held high as I stared him down. This tact never works on him because he knows all of my weaknesses.

“yes because I know the second you lay a finger on me I will be very late for class.”

“No you won't,” he put on hand against the door to keep it shut. He was so close, it made me weak in the knees but i had to stay strong.

“Yes, I will all because you can't keep it in your pants.”

He wrinkled his nose in disgust. “You sound like our high school health teacher.”

“Good, at least sex wasn't on your brain 24/7 when she constantly said that to the class.”

“We didn't have sex until college I say I did pretty well-”

“Keep it in your pants Thomas.”

“Baby,” he whined, leaning in. His hands went to rest on my hips.

“I'll make a song about it. I swear i will,” i threatened yet leaned into his touch. I put my hand against his chest, trying and failing, to push him away. My own body was betraying me. He ran his thumb over the apple of my cheek. He was so warm against me and god i could feel his muscles under my hand but i'll be late if i keep going with this. Fuck.

I pushed myself off the door and on to the tips of my toes to get a kiss. He gladly gave me one, his hands still loose on my hips. His lips moved against mine as i wrapped my arms around his neck to get closer. When the kiss got deeper i had to pull back. 

“Later,” i told him breathlessly. I grabbed my bag and tried to convince myself that i stood my ground when really he got just what he wanted out of me, but damn it felt good.

\---

My first class started with a few whispers of a kid having to be taken to the hospital. I didn't ask questions, just kept my eyes forward and focused on what the professor was saying. My friend Dolly sat next to me. She flicked a piece of paper at me and i retaliated with a slightly bigger piece. This went on for a while, till we almost got called out by the professor.

The class ended and I checked my watch.

“Do ya have Bio after the break,” she asked with a skip in her step.

“Sadly.”

“Aw come on Jemmy it's not that bad. Just remember that it's your only science.”

“That's what keeps me going.” I smiled at her. “How was your break?”

“Oh James it was amazing. I took a trip to Brazil and spent time teaching English. The wildlife was spectacular and the kids were so sweet. I have a picture in my room, you can stop by later if you want to see it.” She took a breath. “What about you?”

“I got to revisit why I hate hospital food so much.”

“Was it bad this time?” Her dew like eyes were layered with concern.

“It wasn't as bad.”

“Did coffee trigger it this time, or was in anxiety?” She was just as thorough as a Thomas with her questioning.

“I didn't sleep for a few days because of some night coughing and i guess my heart couldn't take it. I got dizzy and collapsed.” My heart gave a flutter in my chest like it always does, everyday, no matter what. “My parents rushed me to the hospital.”

“What about Thomas?”

“He was in new york at the time.” I brought my voice down. “His father was trying to teach him more about the business.” Dolly nodded her head. Not a lot of people knew this much about me or Thomas but Dolly did. She was my best friend, without her i would keep everything bottled up inside. 

“What did he do when he found out?” She was enveloped in the story as we walking to the dinning hall to eat the lunch provided. 

“Cursed his father for dragging him away and had a panic attack over the phone. He wanted to be on the next plane to Virginia to see me.” We got in line and started picking out our food.

“That is very Thomas. I'm not sure how he survived before you showed up.”

“He was a player,” I told her with a shrug. “Somedays I wonder why he wanted me when I showed up.”

“He was what! Well i never heard about that! Tell me, tell me!” We sat at an empty table in the back to carry on our conversation.

“What is there to tell? He's handsome, girls and guys were all over him.”

“See now this is the juicy stuff i need to know Madison. Don't hold out on me. Besides the hospital, how was the rest of the break?”

“Uneventful. My family didn't want me to strain myself so I basically stayed indoors listing to my siblings argue I thought about bailing one night and driving up to new york but Jefferson talked me down from that.”

“I swear you two are each others self-discipline.” 

“That's one way to look at it. I think it's more of he corrupted me.”

“Really, I could see it the other way around, but I mean you guys are so cute it makes me want to throw up and wish i had that at the same time. It's unfair.”

“I'm sure there is a girl for you.”

“Unlikely.” she grabbed my arm in a quick motion nearly pulling my arm out of its socket. “Oh! oh! oh! I have to tell you!”

“Tell me what?”

“You know Theodosia right?” She smiled excitedly with the new gossip she had.

“What kind of question is that?”

“Just yes or no!”

“Yes.”

“Then you know Aaron?”

“My boyfriend’s best friend and legal partner? Yeah, I know him.”

“Goodddddd because they are getting married~!”

“No! no way! When?”

“Ahh! over the summer! Aaron proposed because, and you can't tell anyone not even Thomas, because,” she looked around and covered her mouth. “He got her pregnant,” she whispered.

“Oh lord.”

“That's what I said but Theo loves him and said yes.” 

“Is she really, well,” I patted my stomach.

“She is! Why do you think shes not her? She's on the same teacher course as us right? She should be here but she's 5 months in.”

“Holy shit. It must have happened before the break.”

“It had to.”

“What is it?”

“She won't say but Aaron has looked terrible all day so I can guess.”

“What do you think?”

“Well I shouldn't say but I think girl.”

“Why?”

“Aaron has no idea how to raise a little girl. I bet money that he is scared shitless.”

“You always think that.”

“It's because it true.” She smiled and took a heaping spoonful of her pudding out of the cup. “I just can't wait for the official announcement.They always were such a cute couple.”

“Who told you all of this?”

“Oh, jemmy I have my sources.”

“It was Theo wasn't it.”

“No...maybe...yes.”

*Thomas*

I was often honest with myself and the honest truth at that moment was that James trying to intimidate me and stay firm would have given me a boner if i thought we had time for it. 

Another honest truth floating around in my head was that i was going to ace these classes. I never worried about my classes. Teachers loved me and I had already read all of the law books for this year. I was over prepared like usual and it might be my downfall this time.

Despite all that I still felt fear blooming in my mind but I had reason this time. That reason came from my phone twenty minutes after James left in the form of an email. An email from a law firm.

Burr slid into the seat next to mine that i was saving for him. With a stone-faced look he downed the rest of his drink.

“What happened to you,” i asked twirling my pencil in my hand as i waited for the class to start. Third one of the day.

“I wasn't prepared for this.” He stared at the white board our professor was writing on.

“For what, class?”

“No, this year. It's all going by Thomas.”

“...did Theo spike your coffee again?”

“What-”

“-Because we both know how weird you get with tequila in your system-”

“-Again-,” he stammered trying to get more than a word in.

“-the last thing any of us wants is philosophy Aaron.”

“I agree with Thomas,” a voice rose in the row behind us. 

“Thank you stranger,” I called back. 

Aaron shook his head trying to smile. “You seem in a good mood.”

“That's because I am.”

“Can I ask why?”

“How about you guess.” I rested my hand in my hands and leaned forward on my elbows while he rolled his eyes.

“Sure I guess we have time. Let me see. James isn't here so I can eliminate that. Is it something with your father?”

“Nope. he wishes.”

“I don't know. I give up.”

“You barely tried but if you must know.” My grin grew and my voice dropped. “I was offered a job working at the law firm of Adams and Jay.”

Aaron’s eyes widened. “You're kidding.”

“Nope, I got the email this morning.”

“What did James say?”

“I...I haven't told him.”

“Are you going to?”

“If I take it I will.”

“What do you mean if? Thomas everyone in this room would kill to get that job.”

“Aaron I understand that but I don't think it would be smart to be gone to the city all weekend for a job I don't need.”

He studied me for a second then shook his head. “You don't want to be away from James do you?”

I looked away, unable to meet his eyes. “What if something happens? He doesn't have family here except for a cousin I have yet to meet. If he needs me and it's an hour away i will never forgive myself.”

“He would want you to take the job. This is your future.”

“So is he.”

He put a hand on my shoulder, willing me to look at him again. “You know what to do. Take the job. Get your name out there. If you are worried it'll keep an eye on him during the weekends.” 

“Thanks. I'll tell him tonight but before that, we get to talk about what's eating you up.

“What do you mean, I don't know what you mean.” He played with the cuff of his sleeve and stared at the syllabus being passed around.

“What happened Aaron. Is it something about Theo?” I poked him on the shoulder repeatedly. “'m like a hound dog Burr I will find out.” He slapped my hand away so I jabbed him in them side. He had to stifle any move mats to not alert the profesor as class went on. 

“I have been doing this for years.” It was true that I had been practicing for a while. Dating James came with him trying to hide a lot of things so I had to finely tune my bullshit detector.

“It's not important.”

“You're my friend, therefore, it's important. It's Theo,” I decided with a nod.

He ran his hands over his face. “Yeah,” he said finally. “Yeah, it's Theo. She's pregnant.”

“Burr you idiot,” I hissed in a low voice. I grabbed his wrist so hard it was going to leave bruises.

“It's not like we planned it,” he whisper-yelled back. “She didn't even know until the third month!”

“Oh god, how long has it been?”

“Five. Five months. God Thomas, it's a girl. I love Theo but-”

“If you say anything about you leaving I will punch you!” My grip tightened.

“I would never leave her. No, I love her too much and the baby I will love just as much.” I released him, satisfied with the answer he gave me but not with the situation.

“But?”

“But I am afraid. I barely knew my parents, I don't have anything to go off of.” He took a deep breath. “Theo and I are getting married after she is born.”

We were both quite. “Any names,” I asked trying to lighten the mood. 

“No, none yet. I don't know what I'm going to do. Theo said she would put school on hold saying that a lawyer would make more money than a teacher. I'm forcing her to stop her dreams. She must hate me.”

I put my hand on his shoulder trying to find the words to calm him. Burr had always been so calm and strong but this was Aaron. Burr in the court had to be bias but Aaron got to be afraid and ask for help and friends. I had to remind him of that.

“Aaron you will do just fine. Theo will be there to help you through it all and you always have me.”

He calmed still rubbing his wrist but at least there was a smile, “thank you.”

 

*John* 

Classes came and went and so did my mind from thought to thought. I had to fight to keep away questions about Alex from floating in and distracting me. I sat back in my chair during my last lecture trying not to let my head hit the table. All the anxiety I had, had flushed out of my system leaving me worn and tired. I trudged back to my dorm room just wanting to collapse on my bed but before I could even get a foot up the stairs a hand grabbed me by the arm.

“John! It's so nice that I ran into you!” Martha was grinning up at me. “My friends and I are heading to a diner do you want to tag along?”

“Uh,” think John. You can have friends or no friends, popularity or a sad ass year. Pick one. “Sure.” I picked the wrong one.

“Spectacular,” a girl next to her cheered, with just as much energy as Martha. I walked with them out to the outside world. The sun was going to start setting soon but still had the same shine. I loved the day but welcomed night, for she was my mistress. We were met by another young woman who radiated a raw elegance and power.

“So that's Dolly,” Martha told me pointing to the girl who was with us in the staircase. “And that's Sally.” 

The new addition smirked, her eyes sizing me up like a big cat hunting. “So this is the boy from yesterday day? You got knocked flat on your ass by Martha?” Sally scared me by her nature. she was the tallest in the group and didn't dress like the others. Dolly and Martha had on colorful tee shirts and skirts while Sally had a tight-fitting leather jacket and clucky steel-toed boots.

“She caught me off guard,” I tried to defend. She was not impressed.

“Leave him alone Sally,” Martha demanded. “Not all men are strong!”

“James could kick his ass,” Sally snickered. 

“Who’s ass am I supposedly able to kick.” A boy a little shorter than me looked up from a booking he was reading. He had been standing next to Dolly the whole time yet i hadn't noticed him. His face gave me a sense of deja vu and familiarity.

“Oh,” he said when Sally jabbed a finger my way. “Yeah, I could see me winning.” The girls all hooted with laughter and I could feel a blush coming on. 

Sally clasped me on the shoulder. “I like this kid. Much better than the last one.”

“What last one,” I asked weakly. 

“Stop trying to scare him,” James smiled. “‘The last one’ stopped showing up because he has ’better’ things to do.”

“The last one was James’s boyfriend,” Dolly explained while Martha led the way happily chatting with James. 

“Apparently Thomas is too good for us,” Sally said flatly her eyes on James.

James scowled at her, “your just bitter because you don't have anyone.”

“Do you want to fight Madison!”

“Are you willing to fight Jefferson,” Sally countered.

“I could fight him.”

“Fight him and lose,” James snorted. 

“I dislike you greatly right now.”

“The feeling is mutual,” James grinned at her. 

I took in the sights as we walked on. Hercules and i were too busy talking to look around. There were stores lining the streets, showing off items in the windows. We all stopped in front of the burger place I went to with Hercules. Dolly pushed us in and we got a table. After ordering Dolly reached across the table to where James sat next to me and plucked his phone out of his hands. 

“Hey-”

“Nope. Not hearing it. Remember the rule, James.” 

“No texting significant others at the table,” Sally sang. Dolly shut the phone off and pocketed it.

“Fine but if Thomas gets worried it's your fault.”

Dolly shrugged and took a drink of her water. “So how was the first day of college you two,” she asked Martha and me.

“Exciting,” Martha squealed. “I loved every second.”

“It was new,” I told them. "I was very nervous all day. Oh, but I did meet a kid who had to go to the hospital in my first class.”

“Mandatory history,” James asked

“That's the one.” 

“I'm in that. I heard something about Red Bull and coffee.”

“Yeah, he mixed them together. His friend had to carry him out.”

“Sounds like an adventures first day,” Sally smiled. 

I nodded my head and once again my mind wondered back to the thought of Alex but I fought back. “So how do you all know each other?”

“Sally, James and I met last year,” Dolly told me. “And Martha is my little sister.”

I looked at them. “You look nothing alike.” 

“Step sister technically,” Martha smiled, “but still sisters all the same.”

“Isn't it odd having family at the school?”

“Not at all,” Dolly laughed. She pushed a fry from the food that had arrived into her mouth “I'm not the only one.”

“Don't you have like a cousin here, James,” Sally question.

“I do, but I haven't seen him.” I took a second to study his face, he did look familiar. 

“Hercules,” I snapped my fingers finally piecing it together. “Your cousin is Hercules.”

“James,” raised an eyebrow at me. “He is. I'm guessing you've seen him.”

“I live with him. He's my roommate.”

“Small world.”

“Small college,” Sally corrected with a smile. 

\--- 

I left the group after I ate and headed back to my room. It was a good thing I did because Hercules looked ready to blow his brains out.

“What year did the Columbian exchange start,” he groaned as I closed the door.

“15 somethin.”

“Ughhhhhhhh,” his head hit the table. “I hate this stupid class. I am to be a designer, not a historian.”

“It's not so bad.” I set my bag down on my bed and flipped through the history book. I laid the page he was looking for down in front of him. “There see.”

“Thanks,” he grumbled sitting up and copying the answer. “Did you have fun with the girl gang?”

I laughed pulling out my chemistry book. During the trip to the diner, I had texted him about the girls. “They were definitely interesting. Don't forget about James though.”

“He wouldn't be ashamed of being called a part of a girl gang.”

“Huh. Ya know your cousin is a cool dude. He's pretty chill.”

“He always has been,” he went back to writing then looked back up. “Who is the guy you were texting me about? The one he's dating?”

“I don't know. His name is like Thomas or something. It sounds like they have been dating for some time.”

“They have? I wonder why he never told me.” He bit his lip and went back to the homework. “I let you copy it when I'm done.”

“I'll get started on the science work then.”

“Thank god! I don't understand that shit.”

“That's why you have me.”

*James*

I walked Dolly to her room as she talked on and on about her trip to Brazil. “You should come with me this summer, I signed up to do the program again.”

“I don't think that's such a great idea.” I tapped a finger softly over my heart.

“Right, I forgot. Maybe we can go to a different place. One that they will clear you to go to.”

“I'll think about it.”

She hugged me as we stopped outside her door. “It will be okay Jemmy. You have so many people looking after you that nothing will ever happen.”

I smiled back but once her door closed the smile dropped. I knew I had people looking after me and I hated it. I was a burden on everyone, Dolly, my family and most of all Thomas. He will never have a normal life as long as I'm in it. 

I knew from a young age, when all my sickness left me with a faltering heart, that i wouldn't last long. I didn't let myself make connections but then Thomas came along. Swaggering down the hallway crowded by students who would do anything to get one night with him. With all that he still chose me, for some reason. I didn't want him to, yet I was selfish enough to still date him and one day I was going to break his heart. All because I didn't have the brains to never let us be partners in chemistry.

I wondered a little ways down the hall to the staircase. I went to the next floor which really looked just like the one before it. Everything always looked the same to me.

The tall one wasn't there when I got back making the room seem empty and far too big. I set my bag down and tossed my coat aside. I got into his bed instead of mine and buried myself in the large blanket on his bed. It was soft to the touch and smelled like honey and sunshine and just everything safe to me. It was just like Thomas. I fought back tears because if I cried now he would know and be worried. He did need the right now.

\---

I ended up falling asleep without meaning to. When I woke up It was dark outside the window. the light in the room came from a lamp on my desk that was switched on. Thomas was on the floor several law books spread out around him, all open to random pages. His was typing furiously on his laptop and would then turn back to consult the books once more. He cursed and just stopped completely, scrubbing his face with his hands.

I sat up slowly, my eyes still heavy with sleep his blanket wrapped around me. “Problems in the legal world?”

His eyes met mine and he released a breath letting his muscles relax. “Lots and lots.” He sat back leaning against my bed his eyes closed. 

“Stressed?”

His lips twitched up into a smile. “You know me too well baby.”

I stood up, leaving the blanket behind. moved to my bed, leaning over the side i rubbed my thumbs against the tense muscles on his shoulder. He let them drop completely, practically melting under me. 

“What is it that has you this worked up?”

He was quiet for a second. “I should tell you.”

“Tell me what?” I kept going on his shoulders and moved down his back. “Come up here,” i told him patting the bed. “It will be easier for both of us.” He stood up before laying right back down on his stomach his arms folded under his head. I worked my hands over him, feeling pops and shifts as he breathed. 

“Alright, now you can tell me.”

“I am working on a case.”

“For who?”

“It's not a who because it's not a client. It's to prove I have what it takes-”

“Please don't beat around the bush.” I kissed the spot between his shoulder blades. “If you don't want to tell me you don't have to.”

“I want to,” he rolled over onto his back, almost pushing me off. Taking both my hands in his he started an answer. “ I got an offer to work at The law firm of Adams and Jay.”

My mind stilled as I processed what he was saying. “Thomas... that's amazing! You're taking the job right? I mean of course your taking it, right?” I moved so he could sit up. 

“Yes, baby I'm taking it.”

“This is great. I knew you were better than the rest of them.”

“Isn't that what I keep telling you?”

“This isn't about me,”I told him kissing one of his hands. “It's about you and that brilliant mind of yours.”

He leaned in for a kiss that i granted him. His hand rested on the back of my head drawing me closer and i gladly gave myself up so i could be close to him. I let him lay me down on the bed still hovering over me, long fingers and warm hands on my body.

“We never did get to finish what you started this morning,” i smirked, reaching up to grab his shoulders pulling him closer to me. Yeah i was selfish but i would be a fool to not love him while i still had the time

His hands against my skin as he pushed up my shirt caused me to whine for more. “We never did,” he agreed with a Cheshire grin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New releases on Fridays now so I can destroy my grades to make art


	4. At Your Service

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Laf get emotional and John falls hard for our favorite schottish tragedy

*Alex*

I was released shortly after I remembered how to speak English. My legs were still heavy from the drugs and caffeine but I was alive. That's what mattered. I ducked down under Lafayette’s cold glare. Seeing him angry was rare and terrifying. 

“I have half a mind to put you back in the hospital,” he threatened. I sat in the passenger seat my hands in my lap twisting painfully in the dark car. “What was going through your, head Alexander! We missed the first day because of your dumb idea! You could have hurt your heart and your mind!”

“I'm sorry,” I mumbled. I didn't know what else to say. What was there to say? 

“No more all-nighters.” I faced him my mouth opened in protest.

“What-” 

“-You will be eating all meals now-”

“-Laf-”

“Thirty pounds.” the random number stopped me in my tracks. 

I sat in confusion. “What?”

“Thirty pounds. You are thirty pounds underweight. If I am to get a job and such I would like to be at ease about you being alive. Now we have hospital bills on top of that! Were you even thinking!”

The more he talked the more worked up he got. It had always been like this and it made my heart hurt that I had pulled him to this point. He was my only family and I did something reckless. “I'm sorry I said softly. It's not like it was deadly.”

“Shut up Alexander.” He was using my full name, that was never a good sign. “Just shut up. I don't see how a genius like you ends up doing shit like this. All the fights at school! The thief-”

I felt an explosion push against my chest. Blind fury made me spit out my response because this was so much more than caffeine now.

“I did what I had to,”I yelled. “we were hungry! We were outcasts! We don't even have clothes! Hell at one point we were practically homeless!” He clenched his jaw. I was right, I always was. “We had nothing as kids and we had nothing now but that doesn't make us irrelevant to the world. They told us that we would be nothing!” I felt tears coming on as a lump formed in my throat. They made fun of our mothers our fathers! They beat you up for being different!”

He physically flinched at being reminded of it all. Those kids were cruel but the adults were even worse. I loved George and Martha but when he was in trouble I went with him. We fought by each other's sides. I stole bread and wallets and got everything I could to help us. It was never enough.

“That doesn't make anything right. That doesn't make anything you do right. Mixing drinks doesn't make you a great philosopher. Dying young won't leave a future.”

“It should! They told us we would be nothing! I refuse to-”

“Then don't die drinking caffeine and not eating! Dammit, Alexander, you can't have a legacy if you are dead.” There was a crack in his voice as he talked himself in circles. I saw the tears on his face catch on a passing street light. “I thought you would have learned by now that all that pent-up anger at the world won't make this better for us. Your mother wouldn't want a life of nothing for you.”

That comment took the wind out of me. It was enough to strip away the fight and leave nothing but a little boy in Nevis in its wake. If it had been anyone else I would have punched them but this was my brother even if we were not related by blood.

“I'm sorry,” I choked. Tears were in my eyes, rolling down my face, and falling down onto my jeans. “I was trying to- I was trying to figure out a better route. I was up all night writing an article for a newspaper. I was trying to get money. I'm sorry.” I was now balling into my hands and didn't even feel the car stop or Laf pull me close. I buried my face in his chest like I did so often as a kid. 

It took me back to lying beside my own mother, seeing what a child never should. I watched her die. She held me as she took her last breath. Every moment of that week that it got worse I talked to her about everything. Everything she could tell me and over and over she told me she loved me. Her voice tapered off that night off into nothing I still spoke. I prayed trying to get her to say anything. I didn't die. I walked out of that house 

I had been 10 when my mother died and I was left alone. I fought for everything I had. I stole just what I needed and felt guilty no matter how small it was. I was 12 when an organization that has long since been disbanded took me to Virginia. It didn't matter. Middle school and Nevis was all the same to me. I still fought, I still stole, I still hid, I still cried myself to sleep each night, I was still the immigrant with no family. But so was the 13 Frenchman who showed up the next year. We were brothers bound by our pasts. we would help each other get to our futures.

By the time we had gotten back to campus it was midnight. We wasted no time getting to our room and collapsing on our beds. I blocked out all memories like I always did. I understood that I had a duty to my mother to do one thing and one thing only: survive. I had one last thought before I shut my eyes and that was, I would see the day that I rose to be more than what I was born as and my mother's memory would rise with me.

 

*John*

My morning started late which meant that I had only five minutes to wiggle into my skinny jeans, grab my bag and go with Hercules on my heels. We barely made it to the hall on time. We took our seats and I allowed myself to take a few deep breaths before realizing I forgot my phone. Fuck. 

I slumped down and prepared to take notes but a certain someone stopped me. “Is this seat taken?”

“No-no it's free,” I stammered pulling my bag out of the chair beside me. Alex and his friend from yesterday sat down sharing a few words and Laf forced a granola bar into Alex’s hand.

He took a bite and smiled. “I wanted to say thanks for not robbing me when I passed out yesterday.” I was barely focusing on his words as I tried to bun the image of his eyes in my mind. You could see him thinking and learning behind those intelligent sparkling eyes.

“It was no problem,” I laughed nervously and immediately facepalmed on the inside. His friend nudged him as the professor started. I turned back to the lesson. A few minutes later a piece of paper bumped against my arm. At the top of that page was elegant writing saying, 

‘do you have the lesson from yesterday?’

‘Yes. I can give it to you.’

‘Just send me pictures. Do you want my phone number?’ damn, he was smooth. 

‘I don't have my phone with me to put in.’ I tried to pretend that I wasn't a nervous wreck at this moment when our hands touched as I handed him back his paper.

‘No problem.’ He tore off a piece of the bigger page and wrote on it. I pocketed it with an inward smile but not before I admired the beauty of his cursive-print handwriting. 

‘By the way, my name is John Laurens.’

‘Alexander Hamilton. At your service Mr. Laurens.’

 

*Hercules*

I had known John for three days, really I knew nothing about him but I did know that the look in his eyes after class meant something. He was in love alright.

“They are going to be unbearable,” the Frenchman told me in our next class. We turned out to have a very similar schedule which was nice because he was right they were going to be unbearable.

“You know Alex pretty well right,” I asked recalling how Alex greeted him when he was half unconscious.

“Yes, he is my Meilleur ami.”

“You're what?”

“My apologies. My, I should say, best friend? I believe that is what it is. I have known him for a long time. He is like a brother if gremlins had the capacity to love.”

I had to keep myself from laughing too loud in the nearly quiet room. “So then do you think this will be short-lived?”

“The only thing short about this is how much time it took.” He sat back in his seat. “Alex has never had that look before. The only question now is how long we can stand it.” He gave me a sweet smile and went back to the task we were given. 

The answer to the last question came that night as John talked on, and on and on. “Gah his eyes are so beautiful,” he squealed into his pillow. I kept myself from betting him to death with my textbook.

“If their so beautiful,” I said through gritted teeth. “Then go talk to him.”

“I can't do that.” He sat up straight with his shoulders back and face serious. “I have to play hard to get.”

“Why on earth would you do that?” I turned in my chair to give him a quizzical look.

“He might not like me!” He rolled onto the floor to stare at the ceiling. “I have to feel things out!”

I went back to my work so I wouldn't have to look at him. “Maybe you should go feel a few things out and take care of those hormones.” I was grinning wide when a pillow hit me in the back of the head. I broke out in bellowing laughter as John went on a rant about everything he felt at that moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry I didn't update on time. I was working so I did it today! hope you enjoy! sorry, its short!


	5. Cutest Couple

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Herc and Laf sneak off, John is forced to see the girl gang and Alex just wants to see John.

I lasted exactly two days. For the moment they met I knew I would have the urge to strangle Alexander but I thought it would take longer. I sat through the hell of them only communicating through text for two weeks before I was fully ready to snap.

Petit lion was on his back arms stretched out texting on his phone he paid for with his summer job, it matched my own. The sounds of typing were only interrupted by the slap on the device falling onto his face than him resuming the cycle. I was going to lose my mind as the dull click went on till I got a message of my own. 

Herc 7:58: they are doing it again

Me 7:58: sadly, I am aware

Herc 7:59: I have two beers 

I smiled at my phone and promptly snapped my textbook closed. I knew the plan. For two weeks Herc and I have been leaving to go hang out whenever Alex and John got unbearable. Tonight as no different and I was thankful for the exit.

Me 8:00: see you in ten

Alex asked no questions when I practically ran to get out of the cramped dorm room. He only typed some more, I did not enjoy the dismissive behavior but I didn't care at the moment. The air outside was brisk and went right through my thin jacket. I made a beeline for the tree where we met each night we did this. To my delight, he was already there taking a sip of one of the before mentioned beers.

“A little late isn't it,”I asked.

He groaned. “I know but I was going to lose it if I didn't get out of there.” Handing my bottle to me he pulled me away to walk with him. We followed the same path every time. Down the streets then back up to the lake where we sat and watched the water. 

“This place is a lot more different than home,” he told me finishing his off where I had only started. 

“It is not that different from my own,” I admitted.

“Oh? Where did you grow up?”

“Small town in Virginia.”

“Really,” he grinned. “I can't imagine you growing up in Virginia.”

“Why?” Here it comes I thought. All the teasing I received in high school was going to follow me to college and here it was.

“Because of the accent. I bet those kids were in love with all the Frenchness.” I didn't know what to say. He took a turn I wasn't expecting. He met my eyes, “I mean you had to be the most popular kid there right?”

No part of me even wanted to correct him. It dawned on me that I didn't have to be the orphan anymore, I could rewrite my past. “Yes! I was loved by the students.” a lie. All a lie.

“And why not everything about you is amazing.” He looked back at the street and I was glad he did so that he missed my flustered behavior that followed his words.

 

*John*

Hercules, as I soon found out, had many mutual friends as I did. One of those friends was Martha the other was Dolly. They both held on to one of my arms to keep me from fleeing as I was dragged out to another girl gang meeting. 

“Guys don't make me go!”

Dolly flashed me a look. “You're driving Hercules up a wall with all this texting.”

“This is an intervention,” Martha added sternly. 

“But I have things to do!”

“Like what,” dolly challenged

“homework,” I lied

“If homework is texting boys then I'll say you have an A-plus in the class.”

I felt my face heat up. It's not like that

“Mhm,” Martha sassed. “Sure let's go with that.”

Sally sat next to me in the diner as a way to keep me from leaving. I sat through their gossip once again, of course, i would be lying if I said I didn't like it. 

“Word on the street is that there is a freshman in one of the political science classes that has a death wish on our Thomas,” Dolly grinned. I tried to pretend that I didn't know that it was Alex she was talking about. He was five feet of condensed rage and all of it was pointed at Thomas.

“Speaking of the tall one where is he, and James?” Sally questioned. “Didn't they say they were coming. They're late.”

“Fashionably late,” a tall curly haired man corrected. James stood beside him.

“By fashionably he means that he spent twenty minutes trying to figure out why ketchup wasn't a smoothie.” They took the seats across from Sally and me while dolly and Martha sat at heads of the table.

Sally snorted. “Really? Are you brain dead?”

“James said that I couldn't drink straight up ketchup like a smoothie.”

“I didn't say you could I said it wouldn't be enjoyable.”

Dolly rolled her eyes at the pair. “So john this is Thomas.” She introduced. “He's dating James.”

I frowned at Thomas for a second who looked to the girls for help. “Do you know someone named Lafayette by chance?” I asked finally after a long look at him.

 

Thomas groaned and sally cheered. That's twelve people that have asked him that question.

“My question is who is Lafayette and why is he wearing my face!”

James snorted, “maybe he's your double with less of an ego.”

“He definitely has i informed him. He's a nice guy. You should go find him.” 

“Maybe I will,” Thomas nodded his head. “So whats poppin' in the girl group?”

Martha beamed, “I have some news.” All attention was on her. “You two better get ready to defend your crown.” she shot her words at the couple.

“What crown,” Thomas inquired, laying an arm on his boyfriend's shoulders.

“Your Crown as cutest couple. I have a boyfriend now.” Everyone shared a look then looked back at her.

Dolly narrowed her eyes. “Who?”

Martha straightened up. “His name is Charles Lee. He's in ROTC”

“Didn't we go to high school with him,” James asked his boyfriend.

“If he wasn't on the basketball team I won't remember his name.”

“You play basketball,” I smiled

“Yeah. all middle school and high school.”

“One of the best players,” James added with a bit of pride. 

Thomas grinned at the words. “Did you play?”

“Basketball and football every year of high school.”

He nodded his head, “ I wanted to do football but I'm not built for tackling.”

“Excuse me,” Martha snapped. “Can we get back to the part where Charles and I are the new cutest couple?”

 

“Is there a size difference,” Sally asked like it was a normal question.

“What?”

“Is there a size difference between you two? What makes the dorks so cute is that one is like a foot shorter than the other.”

“I'm not that short,” James muttered.

“No,” Martha admitted, “but-”

“Is he really quite,” Dolly sighed.

“He's loud like me-”

“Again what makes Jemmy and Thomas cute is that James is so quite yet Thomas is outgoing.”

“Is he afraid of you,” sally pushed. “Thomas is afraid of James.”

“I am not,” Thomas butted in

James raised an eyebrow. “Yes, you are.”

They locked eyes for a second and Thomas fell quite while the girls went back to picking Martha apart.

“See?” Sally grinned, “they work together. Another thing that makes a cute couple is when the smaller one wears the bigger one's clothes like James.”

“I do not”

“Baby you're wearing my coat right now.” Thomas didn't even try to hide his amusement.

James pulled the purpled color coat tighter around him. “It's cold,” he said simply. 

Thomas pulled him closer with a smug look as Sally groaned with disgust. “Lastly when they do shit like that it's so cute is sickening.”

Martha scowled at her. “Charles and I can be cute like that too. You'll see. I'll bring him out with us next time.”

“Okay honey,” sally dismissed. “we’ll put it to the test then. What about you john? Any relationship you want to be judged?”

“Not even a little. I don't date.”

“Oh come on.” She threw an arm over my shoulders. “You don't even have your eye on anyone.” Martha made a face and I felt heat rush back to my cheeks. What would they rate Alex and I as? Would we be a cute couple?

“Nope. I hate people.” Thankfully Martha and Dolly didn't break in to poke fun of my misery but it wasn't bad for long when a text caught my attention. 

Alex 6:07: you're good at history, right?

I was quick to reply during the chaos of conversation that followed as I went into my own little world.

Me 6:07: Yeah. Why?

He didn't respond after that and if he did I would never know as my phone was taken out of my hands by Martha.

“I know who it is John and it's a no.” she shut it off and stuck it in her coat pocket. 

“I need to respond to that-”

“Not hearing it,” she answered. “Were under orders to get you to take a break.”

“Hercules doesn't know what he's talking about.”

She laughed, “he hasn't slept in three days because of you.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Oh is that what he told you. He hasn't been sleeping but it's not because of me.” All the girls leaned in and even the couple looked intrigued. 

“Are you implying that my little cousin found someone?” James had the start of a smile on his lips and a glint in his eyes that implied lots of blackmail.

“I don't know. maybe I'll tell you if I get my phone back.” Martha and Dolly met eyes and over the course of two seconds had an entire conversation. 

The younger sister shoved my phone back to me and with a fierce glare said, “spill it.”

*Hercules*

“So you're telling me,”I smiled. “That you have never seen a football game.” 

“Well I've seen a, what you call soccer game, but no I have not seen an American football game.” We sat on the pier at the lake watching the stars as clouds blew across the dark sky. Fourth night in a row and it was still amazing

“That's a shame. Football is amazing.”

“You play?”

“In high school.” I left out the part where it was because my father wanted to make me more manly. 

“Was it fun?” Our feet knocked together. His tennis shoes against my boots.

“It was alright. I like watching it more than I like playing it.”

“Hm, maybe you can teach me that rules some time.”

“I would be glad to.” The vibration of my phone against the wood we were laying against startled me from the soft conversation.

“Who is it,” he asked with a slight yawn.

“It's John,” I told him glancing at the message. “He's asking where I am.”

“Odd. Did you not say he was with the gang of females.”

I laughed slightly at his word choice. “I thought he was.”

“Perhaps we should head back if he's looking for you.” We should. It was late and getting dark but I wanted to stay out here amongst the stars. 

“Do you want to head in?”

“Non. I would rather be here. Alex has not been good company as of late.”

“Neither has John. I want to strangle him.”

“I would have done it to Alex by now but I am certain his habits will take him out before I do.” I chuckled and laid back down next to him. The water was whipping up due to wind but I paid it no mind. I felt peaceful for the first time in these two first weeks of school. Things would be okay.

“Hercules?”

I smiled, “Yes Lafayette?”

“Do those clouds look like rain clouds?”

My smile dropped as I sprinkle of rain hit my nose. “Shit.”

\---

I learned several entertaining french curses on that run back to campus in the pouring rain with flashes of lightning streaking across the sky. We skidded into the main entrance of the dorm area with heavy breaths. 

“Man I'm out of shape,” I coughed. Laf wasn't doing much better.

“I need to go he,” told me urgently moving towards his hall.

“Is something wrong?”

“Let's just say my friend isn't too fond of storms.”

I watched him go without another word. I dropped with water on my walk back to my room. John was already there sitting on his bed with his sketchbook. 

“Where were you,” he questioned.

“Swimming,” I responded digging through my bag for dry clothes. He crossed his arms over his chest.

“Who is he.”

“What?”

“The man you've been sneaking off to see. Who is he?”

“A friend.”

“I smell lies!”

I snorted, “it's probably just your socks.”

“I have clean socks and a knack for finding the truth!” 

“I'm going to go shower,” I laughed.

“I will find out,” he called as I shut the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so sorry for the delay I've been so busy


	6. Lights out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex hates storms and Laf helps  
> Thomas and Jemmy do their usual thing  
> Hercules learns something new about John

*Alex*

I felt the storm long before the first strike of lightning. The air was heavy and humid and the wind howled. By the time I heard the crack of thunder I was already buried under serval blankets hugging my knees to my chest of Laf’s bed. 

“This isn't Nevis,” I whispered to myself. “I'm safe. I'm safe.” I was cowering down into the bed as the storm rage. I was cowering like a child once again. That time I had hidden under a bed, I was sure that I would die that time. I was sure that my life would end with me hiding like I tried to never do since.

“Alex?” Laf panicked. He burst into the room with fear in his voice that almost rivaled the very kind I was feeling. 

“Ici,” I cried in French. I twisted out of the blankets desperately like they were my enemy now. His body weight dipped the bed down next to me. I did not question his cold wet clothes nor did I care. He wrapped me up in his arms as I bawled into his chest. 

“Ça va,” he hushed. “Ça va.”

Another clap of thunder shook me to my core. I could see the yellow sky's engraved on the back of my eyelids. The storm that ripped apart my town and left me with even less. It destroyed me. I wouldn't let anything do that to me again. I swore to myself the day after, the day I had to turn to stealing to live than just make money, the day the last bit of innocence I was holding onto died. I swore on that day that I will never feel helpless again.  
I would prevail over this storm wash world

“I'm okay,” I sniffled in English after a minute or two. I forced myself out of the Nevis mindset and that meant no french even if my brain wanted to. “I'm okay,” I repeated when he still held me close. I opened my eyes and physically flinched.

“Petit lion, the lights are out.” he patted me on the back and pulled a blanket between me and him to dry to keep me dry.

“Maybe I'm not okay,” I changed my mind.

“You will be,” laf told me. “I promise one day you shall be better.”

“You've never let me down laf, let's hope this proclamation doesn't.”

 

*Thomas*

I was truly and wholly helpless. I was a leaf being blown in the storm. I was in awe of the beauty of my love. I was at James’s mercy at all times because of the grip he had on my heart. I let him have that grip, and I would never pull away. I wanted him to be with me forever.

I kissed him once then again, harder this time trying to show everything I felt for him in one kiss. Rain poured down on us. our only shelter being a tree. We split up from the girl gang before the first few drops fell and just after John dropped the information of Hercules having a secret boyfriend. I pushed that all out of mind to focus on the god of my heart.

“How cliche are you,” he giggled breathlessly gazing up at me with eyes twinkling from the flash of lightning. He leaned into my body with a gust of wind. “Kissing in the rain? Really?”

“You know you like it.” I connected our lips again and relished the feeling of his body on mine even if we were both soggy. “I love you, baby.”

He tipped forward for another hungry kiss. He pushed away from me with a sly grin. “I love you too but were both going to get sick out here.”

I laughed, “let's head back.” He intertwined our fingers as we walked along the path back to the dorms. He leaned his head softly against me. I rubbed my thumb in circles across the back of his hand. I longed for more contact but we were outside in the rain in the middle of the night. 

The storm reminded me of the storms we got back in Virginia. We would stay outside during those as well to kiss in the rain at the park or under the tree in his backyard. Anything we could do to steal kisses from one another before our families found us gone. We would wait for the pounding rain because it hid the sound of footsteps and door closing. It hid our love for those who would not be so accepting of it.

I kicked off my shoes once we were in our room, then my socks and the rest of my clothes. They joined his in our laundry hamper.

“I'm going to take a shower,” he told me grabbing dry nightshirt and pants. He stopped in the doorway. “Are you going to join me?” his eyes were hooded and glazed with lust but I could still see the twinkle in the light.

I grinned at his offer. “In a minute baby. I have to check my phone.”

“If you take too long you forfeit it all together,” he warned closing the door behind him. I hummed to myself and unlocked my phone that left to charge. Immediately I noticed three things important things. A missed call from my father, a news story screenshot from my brother and an email saying I got the job at the law firm. Before I could react the lights shut off. 

*John*

Alex didn't respond to my texts so instead of pushing it I sat with Hercules trying to make sense of our homework. We gave up on that after a few seconds. It was a Friday night and neither of us was to keen on working on anything. I glanced over at him and got an idea. I decided to push my luck.

“Hey Herc,”I started leaning back in my office chair. I set my pencil aside.

“Yeah,” he responded putting away his papers.

“Can you show me some of your sketches?”

 

He froze up a bit. I knew this might be too far. He always hid them when I was around and I was curious about what they looked like.. I knew they had to be gorgeous from what I've seen of his own coordination of colors and designs.

“You actually want to see them?” His brow was furrowed in confusion.

“Why wouldn't I?”

“I-i don't know. No one has actually wanted to see my work before.”

“If you don't want, me too-”

“No no it's fine,” he offered me a smile. “I would love for you to see it.”

We sat side by side as he explained his ideas for his outfits. There were some dresses on these pages that could put some Vuitton dresses to shame if made just right.

He was passing me the next page just as the lights cut out with a shriek from the wind. I slammed back into the bed. I stumbled till I knocked into the wall. I kept my back to it trying, forcing my breath to be even.

“Holy shit John are you alright?!”

Don't let it in I screamed at myself. My father stalked towards me, my eyes squeezed shut with fear. All was dark yet not quite as my heart pounded in my ear. I felt my stomach curled in painful ways. I waited for the blow-

“John, whats wrong?!” 

Light shone against my eyelids. I dared myself to look at the room washed in the light of his laptop. He was in front of me with a look like he was afraid to touch me.

“Hey,” I managed with a shaky breath. I tried to push off the wall but my legs buckled and he had to catch me. Then we were back where we started, side by side, but this time we were looking at nothing but the youtube video on his laptop. This time we both pretended not to see the tears on my cheeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this wasn't supposed to be the next chapter yet it is in honor of the huge storm ripping through my hometown right now. Thank for reading!!!!!


	7. Party? KIssing? wait...what?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laf and Herc start a-goin'  
> the usual Jeffmads fluff  
> and Alex and John are.....still being losers

The lights had come back on quickly after half an hour. James was now fast asleep next to me but my eyes were on my phone. My father was an asshole which I never seemed to wrap my head around. When I was young all i could do was look up to him but now i would give my left arm to stay far, far away. I didn't want to talk to him but if i didn't call him back there was no telling what he would do. I slowly got up leaving my boyfriend on the bed. I scowled at my device and grabbed it before heading out to the storm swept world. The storm had died down but the worst for me was yet to come. After a deep breath i hit the call back button. Almost immediately there was an answer.

“Thomas,” a deep voice warned. 

“Father.”

“You better have a good answer for why there was announcement of you being the newest junior lawyer and Jay and Adams.”

“Uh, it's called a job.”

“Thomas, you have a duty-”

“To who?

“Do not interrupt me. There are several investors that are now concerned. You are my heir-”

“Unofficial. I have not agreed.”

“You will.”

“I've told you time and time again-”

“You have to,” he commanded. “I did not spend my entire life building this company and neither did your grandfather or his father. You are a bargaining chip! you're gay-”

“-Bisexual-”

“Biracial, smart, well rounded and you're my oldest son-”

“You always use those excuses. I have a life outside the one you made me!”

“Doing what son!? What is it with you!? When you were in highschool you had no problem with this, you embraced it now all you want to do is run off to virginia for breaks! You fight me about everything! You refuse to try to settle down! You never want to go to family gatherings! If I didn't know any better I would say you have something to hide!”

Oh you have no idea. “It's because i don't like any of you people.”

“We are your family.” maybe I found better.

“What is this call even about?”

He cleared his throat. I could imagine him squaring his shoulders to seem more intimidating like he did to me as a child. He didn't scare me then and he still doesn't. “Because you have everyone in a panic about whether you will be the next CEO i need you to come into the city and explain that being a lawyer is a hobby-”

“It's my life choice-”

“Thomas Jefferson you watch your tone. You will tell them what I tell you. You will assure them that you will be my heir and put this all to bed.”

“And if I don't?”

 

He growled. “you and I both know I will pull all fundings you have.”

“I don't need your money.” That was a bluff. His money was how i paid for james’s meds unknowing to james of course.

“You say that know but you'll be singing a different tune in a few months.”

“Fine. what do you want?”

“There will be a meeting next month on the second Friday night, it should be starting a few hours after your classes-”

“No. no, i'm not going in for a meeting!”

“And why not?”

“I will not be seen as some official replacement!”

“Whether you replace me or not you need to be there. If these investors leave the whole company could collapse! Then how will i provide for you little brother?” He hit a cord and he knew it. I bit my tongue to keep any curses from flying out.

“On one condition,” i demanded

“Name it.”

“I get to leave the second it's done, no after talks. Also i don't want to see a single press camera and recorder or even someone taking down notes. I'll go in, I'll say the pre-rehearsed lines and then i walk away. Agreed?”

He was quiet as he thought it over. “Will you wear a suit?”

“Do I really have to?”

“Yes. you can change at the estate.”

“If I wear one will you allow what I have set out?”

“Yes, i will follow your demands.”

“Then were in business. I'll see you next Friday.”

“See you then.”

I hung up up, bristling with anger in the cold September wind. I jammed my phone back in to my pocket and went back up to my dorm room. I had to take a few deep breaths outside my door to recompose myself. I went in silently trying to block out the light from the hallway but it didn't matter James was already semi-awake.

He yawned, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hands wearing one of my hoodies that engulfed him in purple fabric. He looked so adorable that I could feel my anger chip away. He sat up and reached out his hands. 

I took his hands in mine and laid back down next to him. I expected him to snuggle up next to me but he just stayed where he was. Crossed legged, our fingers intertwined.

“What's wrong,” he asked finally.

“Why do you think something is wrong baby?” I lifted his hand to my lips.

He moved to his hand to my cheek. I nuzzled into it. “I can see it on your face.”

“The lights aren't even on darlin’,” i reminded him. I kissed his palm and down to his wrist, over the scars that lay there as a reminder of what i have to lose.

“They don't have to be. What's wrong,” he repeated.

I sighed. Fighting him would be a lost cause. “My father is calling me to a meeting next month.”

“Oh, I'm sorry-”

“I should be saying that to you.”

Why? I'm not the one who has to go face a monster.”

“I pulled a few strings. He should be calmer this time.” 

“He better be,” James grumbled finally laying down next to me. “I'll kick his ass.”

I smiled, “I know you will baby.”

*Herc*

The night after the storm rolled around without a question from me. John was back to normal, he was on another “it's not a study date i swear Hercules” trip to the library with alex. That left me alone with laf both of us with our lips connected.

I'm not sure at what point hangout with laf had turned to kissing him. It all just sprung on me one night. We were drunk, alone, sitting far too close and then it happened. I don't regret it. I didn't apologize although he tried several times. 

One kiss turned into two turned to three and then it stopped. Alex needed him something about John and he was pulled away leaving me a blushing mess on the pier.

“I'm really sorry about yesterday,” he apologized again the next night. “I had one to many.”

“I didn't mind it,”I told. “You kiss pretty well.” 

He shifted uncomfortably on the dock, eyes watching the water. “It was nice,” he admitted. “I did enjoy it.”

“I did to...so…”

“So?”

“Wanna make it more than a one-time thing?”

 

He raised an eyebrow at me. “Do you?”

“Yeah. a lot. Watching Alex and john parade around pretending to not like each other has me all pent up. I like you, I'm willing to give dating shot if you are.”

He smiled, “i mean we have been going on lots of unofficial dates.”

I nodded my head, “we have.”

He shrugged. “So then wanna make out?”

And there it went. It didn't ever go too far past kissing, i got a boner once but so did he. Everything seemed to work itself out and I was happy with that answer. I was fine with just dating him and not doing the weird whatever Alex and john were attempting. I was fine with fast and rough but I wasn't fine with the feeling that he and I were forced by the situation we were in. But the answer to that would come later.

*Alex*

To say i fell in love fast was an understatement. It took me exactly two seconds for me to fall for John. i don't know if it was the caffeine haze or my, as laf would put it, useless social skills, but i fell hard and fast for that man.

The first two weeks were composed purely of texting back and forth, driving Laf up a wall with my lack of speaking to him. After that, it was studying. Lots and lots of studying where I tried not to be so flirtatious as I wanted to be. I felt electricity spark across my skin every time he brushed against me. I felt my heart stop when he said my name in the soft southern accent he had. I was acting like a child but I couldn't help it he was-

“celui avec les étoiles sur ses joues, écrivant le destin pour mon âme asservie. je suis à sa merci.” (the one with the stars on his cheeks, writing the fate for my soul enslaved. I am at his mercy.)

Laf looked ready to snap with metal spoon in half. “It is Friday Alexander, please can we not have one night this month that isn't about petite étoile.”

“You are just jealous that I found someone and you haven't.”

“I wouldn't be so sure of that,” he said simply. I caught the small smile he had when he picked his spoon back up. I leaned in with interest.

“Who is it?”

“There is no one.”

“Yes, there is!”

“There is not. Hush up and drink your juice.”

“Laf-”

“Guys,” Hercules called cutting me off. He slammed his hands onto the table causing myself and the Frenchman to jump. “Guys good news! Were going to a party.”

Laf and I looked at us then back to him. “A what?”

“A party. See i have a friend who is throwing a party at a house in town. She wants me to invite more people to make this the best one of the fall so you two and John are my choices!”

“Why,” laf inquired with a raised eyebrow. 

Hercules grinned at him. “What better people than a Frenchman, a Germlin-”

“-hey-”

“And a dude obsessed with biology!? It will be great! You’ll see!”

We exchanged another look and I asked one simple question that made laf glare:

“Is John going?”

 

*James*

I looked Thomas right in the eyes with a glare i knew could kill men. He didn't back down, he crossed his arms over his chest and i mirrored his movements. 

“No,” I said firmly

“Baby-”

“-Nope-”

“-Darlin-’”

“-Not happening.”

“Cher-”

“-Non”

“C’mon baby, it's only for an hour or so.”

“You know how I feel about these parties.” He did, in fact, know how I felt. These things usually meant I was faced with peoples shit politics that made me bristle with frustration but I kept quiet. Thomas encouraged me to tell them off. He told me I was a good debater, that I would make an excellent lawyer but that's another thing I would never consider. There was, of course, a second reason that I never told my over protective boyfriend about and that was ridicule. When he left me alone at these things, which was rare, I would often find myself being accused of only dating him for his money.

He smirked pulling my by my hip to get me closer i tried to flee. He came to bother my studying just for this and my attempts to escape to the bathroom and lock the door was dashed at that moment. 

“No Thomas,”I fought back a smile.

“Baby it's not that bad. It's a small first-year party.” He pouted out his lip.

“Doesn't mean I like the people.” His other hand rested on my other hip.

“It's called networking love and like it or not i have to do it.” He pulled me to his chest. “You don't have to go-”

“Yes I do,”I glared at him from over my shoulder, it was all playful and he knew it. “Someone has to make sure you don't get too drunk.”

“I'm adult enough-”

“You ate a can of Pringles for dinner last night.”

“Only because you weren't here,” he grumbled.

“That makes me frightened for what happens when I leave during the summers.”

He buried his face in the back of my shoulder. “I mostly just get sad. So you'll come with me?”

“It's a duty I must do.”

“That's great to hear because it's in two hours and i promised to bring you. LOVE YOU BABE,” he yelled darting for the door before i could get a hand on him. That scamming cheat set me up. I hugged and sat back down trying to focus on math equations.

*Hercules*

“Holy shit Herc,” John groaned. “I thought you said this was a small party!”

“I thought it would be,” i laughed seeing the amount of horny, already drunk college kids around the house. Music blared out of speakers and cheers of happiness rose around us. Alex was taking the chance to catch to john who flirting back. Through the disarray neither of them noticed how close the Frenchman was standing to me. 

“Didn't a design buddy invite you,” Alex grinned as john blushed from something the other had said.

“Theater,”I corrected realizing my mistake.

“Oh god,” John whined. “As an art kid i met with lots of theater kids. They're insane. Never turn on ‘time warp’ unless you want your couch on the lawn.” we all ignored his theater kids Vietnam flashback.

Do you guys want to mingle a little first? I asked as we walked around the house to the kitchen with a makeshift bar set up. 

“No,” John snorted, “I hate people.”

“You can say that again,” Alex grumbled. Then stopped abruptly in front of me. “Holy shit! Look who’s here!”

“Who,” John asked poking his head up to see around Lafayette.”

“Thomas Jefferson,” Alex's voice had dropped down to a dangerous growl. The name sounded familiar.

“Oh no,” laf sighed

“Oh no?” I echoed in confusion.

“Petit lion has named Jefferson his enemy.”

“They haven't even met,” John added with a roll of his eyes.

 

“I don't have to,” Alex snarled. “Just look at him, him and his messed up opinions and big hair and tall-ness! all his friends are bad too! I've seen them in class together but i don't know who the guy he’s with right now is.

I finally actually decided to care. Jefferson stood across the room talking to a few people in a group. Who Alex was talking about was the short male he had his arm around. It didn't take but a minute for me to recognize him.

I threw myself to the front of our small group. “James! James!” I called waving him over. He smiled wide at me and waved a quick greeting before heading over, the tall one was still with him. 

“It's great to see you Herc,” we hugged briefly. Is it been some time hasn't it?

“Yeah,” I responded absently taking a quick glance at his boyfriend.

He noticed. “Hercules this is Thomas.” He motioned to the tall one. 

“Nice to meet you,” i offered to him. He wasn't paying attention to me he was instead staring at Lafayette.

“It...it's you,” he gasped. “My god I've found you!”

“Who are you and why is my face also your face?” laf blinked at him in confusion. He sort of looked like a cat who just saw their own reflection for the first time.

“I don't know but I have so many questions.”

“Later,” Alex growled stepping in front of Laf. “Right now I have a bone to pick with you!”

“And you are?”

 

“Alexander Hamilton. I'm in the law class behind you.”

“Mhm. And that makes us…?”

“Enemies!”

Thomas looked to my cousin for help then to laf who shook his head. “How so?”

“Because I hate you and your shit opinions!”

“Okay...so who fed him after midnight?”

I couldn't help but laugh. John had to hide his smile from Alex who was glaring at everyone. “Think your funny huh? You. me. Right now!”

“Are you talking about fighting because you're a tic-tac compared to me.” Alex scowled at him. “Lets picking something more fair.”

“Like what,” the small one questioned 

The Tall one glanced around and his eyes landed on a bar. A wicked grin spread across his face. “Ten shots of whiskey first one down loses.”

Alex seemed a little taken aback by his challenge but he pushed past that. “You're buying.”

“Fine by me.” 

James sighed. “How well is your friend able to hold his alcohol?”

“Alex is a very, very light weight,” Laf answered watching his best friend with worry.

“How good is Thomas?” I knew I wasn't going to like the answer.

“let's just say It takes 10 shots to really start putting him down.”

“Fuck,” I snorted

“Come john let's make sure he does not die.” Laf clasped me on the shoulder. “We will leave you two to catch up.”

I watched laf and John go join Alex. “So cousin…”

He turned back to me. He looked older. It had been some time since i last saw him and he had changed in ways i couldn't even explain. I couldn't imagine him with this guy it was so odd...

“Is it the money,” i asked to which he choked on his water that spurred him into a coughing fit. Thomas looked back over at us from where the shots were being poured. James waved him off as he straightened himself and took a deep breath. Thomas lingered for a few seconds then took first shot all the way to his fifth leaving Alex spitting mad.

“How do you know about that,” he hissed through clenched teeth. So my hunch was right. That was the Thomas Jefferson.

“Know about what? Know that you're dating the son of one of the most wealthy men in new-”

He grabbed me before i could finish my sentence and dragged me by my arm to the backyard, void of most living life forms in the cold night. He turned back on me face serious.

“Okay. damn James. I feel like that was a slight overreaction-”

“No. Listen. Thomas doesn't go spouting off his last name. I'm guessing that weird kid told you it.”

“Alex?”

“Yes that one.” He paced in front of me. “He doesn't like a whole ton of people knowing who his dad is so do me a huge favor and keep it on the down low.”

“But-”

“Ah! Can you do that?”

 

“I guess but I still don't see what the big deal is! So his dad's rich-”

“It's not my place to say why.” 

“Ugh. Since when were you gay? Auntie or you or anyone ever told me about this!”

“….well they might not know.”

“So is it about the money then?”

“What?” There was a slight burn to his eyes.

“Well no one would voluntarily date that, right? Like this is a quick fling, right? Tell me I'm right.”

He shook his head. “Hercules, we've been dating for almost three years.”

“What the hell! Since when!” i felt a sense of betrayal.

“My junior year of high school,” he said it like it was a common piece of knowledge. Like it wasn't a secret.

“But-but I saw you the summer you graduated! Before you went to collage! He wasn't there!”

“He was here, in new york. His dad likes to force him to learn about the company. He takes him every vacation we get.” he stared down at the concrete, chewing on his lip.

“So this really isn't about the money? And you're really gay?”

“Yes, and It's not about the money. I wanted to date him before I knew about all of that.” 

“But come on! He's so much different than you!”

“You had a two minute conversation with him Herc. it's not fair to him to judge him like that!”

“Well, he did just challenge my friend to a drink off…”

He smiled softly and put a hand over his eyes. “He has a tendency to do that.” 

“Why not tell auntie? You guys met in high school so wouldn't she know about him?”

“It's a-”

“If you say long story and dismiss me I swear James.”

“It really is!”

“Tell me,” I whined. “I'm your cousin. I need to know!”

“You sound like you're twelve again.”

“Bro!”

“Fine! Fine! When we started dating I was afraid to come out to my parents and then I just never did tell them. It helped that Thomas also never told his family-”

“You guys are idiots!”

“We're trying our best! When I finally found out about the business thing I figured if I told my family they would all have the same response you did.”

I went quiet. “Do a lot of people think you're with him for money?”

“Lots.”

“I'm sorry.”

“It's fine. I love him anyway, after all, why would we both make it to the same school if this wasn't all fate?”

I guess that's one way to look at it.”

He sighed and smiled. “How are you doing?”

“I'm good.” He gave me a look.

“Hercules you're finally away from your parents and good is all you have to say?”

“Okay it's amazing. Fantastic even. I am glad to be away. Far far away. My parents are kind and supportive but at the same time disappointed. They wanted a marine for a son not a gay fashion designer.” i was the family disappointment no matter how i tried to dress it up. No matter what i said. The things i did before i left home, the things i said were still an open wound rubbed with the salt of reality.

“You're still my favorite cousin if that helps,” He joked with a smile. I felt better about all of it.

“Glad to know.”

“They still love you,” James reminded me as we weaved back into the party. We got there to see Lafayette drag Alex away and john tagging along. Thomas was chatting to another person all together. 

“I should go with my friends.”

“You've only been here for a few minutes”

“We were going to be here longer but you boyfriend got my friend shit faced so gotta go.”

“Fair enough,” He laughed and took a napkin from a coffee table. He jotted down his new phone number and handed it to me. “it was good to see you. Make sure to give him some aspirin.” 

“Will do, see ya cousin.”

\---

“He will be quite the problem in the morning that I refuse to deal with,” Laf announced glaring at the blacked out Alex. 

John couldn't stop laughing. “He-he only did like seven!”

“That's a new record,” Laf groaned. 

“It's hilarious,” the Carolinian laughed.

“Then you stay to deal with him. I'll go sleep in my car.”

“No just sleep in my bed. I'll watch him.” He was still struggling to take down breaths. 

“Good luck,” he muttered leaving his room. I whispered john a good night and closed the door, catching up to Laf when went back to my room. 

“Was that first time that's happened,” I chuckled.

“Non. He drinks people under the table often.”

"He seems like the type that would try and lose." 

He snorted a laugh tension seeping from his shoulders. “They would make a cute couple no?”

“Who?”

“The pair we just left unattended in my room.”

“Oh, right. We didn't think that through.” 

We did not he agreed. He took a seat on John's bed. “They like each other.”

“Well, that's obvious.”

“To everyone but themselves.” he smoothed a few wrinkles on the bed sheets.

“Yes, but they are just kids though.”

“We are all the same age,” he reminded me.

“But they are shorter and Alex is definitely twelve.”

“That is sadly true.” he started to lay down and my grin grew. I watched him for a second before making my move.

“Ya know. There is a perfectly good bed over here.”

He stretched out, his shirt pulled up revealing skin and muscle. he was meeting me head on. “Is that so? Hm, I think this bed is nice too.” He batted his eyelashes. “But I think I can be persuaded to move.” 

“How about we can make out?”

He propped himself up on one arm. “Tempting. How about a little more?”

The look in his eyes washed away any and all doubt I had about our relationship. “How much did you have to drink tonight?”

“I may have taken one or two of alex’s shots while Thomas wasn't looking but I am still in control.” He stood and walked over to me, heel to toe to prove to me that he was sober. He straddled my lap pulling me in for a kiss that I wouldn't deny him. I didn't push him off only snaked my hands up his shirt, desperate for more. My blunt nails dragged down his skin, I could have sworn he purred into my neck at the contact. He mouthed out my skin, his teeth scraped against me roughly, both of our first movements set the pace for tonight.

“You sure?” I asked pulling his shirt up and off. he shivered from the cold and my wandering hands.

He shifted against me breath catching on his words “positive.”

 

*James*

“My god he's heavy,” I wheezed helping Aaron get Thomas up the stairs to our dorm. 

“Don't die,” the drunk mass slurred out.

“Even,” Aaron painted heaving him up onto the landing. “Even when he's drunk he's protective.”

“It's one of his worst traits.” Finally we deposited him on his bed. After several labored breaths from us we could hear him snoring. It was past midnight and the parathyroid had ended with my oversized boyfriend passing out.

“Thank god you were there Aaron I wouldn't have been able to get him here on my own.”

“I don't think he would have drank so much if I wasn't here because of that fact. It's been fun but I need to get going, Theo is home from her moms.”

I nodded my head scowling at the snoring giant. “Thanks again. Drive safe.”

“Have a nice night.” He slapped Thomas foot to which the bigger one groaned and rolled over. “try not to give James any trouble.”

“He can't hear you he is off in his own world.”

“My apologies to you then. Good night.”

“Good night.” He left the dorm, shutting the door behind him. I stared at Thomas again. He was fast asleep and all I wanted to do was curl up next to him and bath in the warmth he gave off but he was drunk so that meant when he woke up he would be very uncoordinated. Last time that gapped he tried to get up and freaked out when he rolled right over the edge taking me with him.

I didn't want a repeat so I shucked off my shirt and bundled up in my blankets listening to him snore. I tried to sleep but It was a quiet night, It was a lonely night. I gave up trying to sleep alone and laid down next to him. He immediately wrapped around me. 

“Missed you,” he slurred the smell of whiskey on his breath made me want to vomit

“I was just over in my bed.”

“‘M too far. Too far.” he gave one last snore and fell asleep his head heavy on my chest but i didn't mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so if it feels like I am heavily focusing on Jefferson and Madison its because I am. see I am very burnt out of Alex/John after home for the holidays and getting laf and herc together had to take some time plus the two have an interesting story arc that herc fits into so I hope you stick around.


	8. The Irish Flu Times Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Thomas both, separately, deal with hangovers and Laf and Herc get to relax

*Lafayette*

The kisses on my neck the following morning were better than any alarm clock I had ever had. Soft light poured into the small dorm room from a window in the corner, music played from a next-door neighbor and I truly felt at peace. 

“Good morning,”I smiled softly staring into hazel eyes still glazed with sleep.

“Good morning,” he repeated planting a soft kiss on the corner of my mouth. “How are you feeling?”

“Sore,” I replied stretching my legs and wincing at the pain in just about every part of me. “It was worth it no matter.”

He pressed his lips to my neck again along the line hickies he left there. “You did really well for your first time,” he hummed. I felt heat rush to my face as he chuckled. The night had been one of the best in my life and the most painful yet I enjoyed it. We would both be walking away with a good amount of bite marks and scratches. It was amazing.

“You did make it easy for me.” that was true. He led me to everything, explained it all, was gentle even when rough. It was what I needed and better than I could have hoped. 

He smiled and ran his thumb over the purple marks. “Alex won't notice these will he?”

“He is to short to see my neck,” I joked resing my forehead against his. “I will wear my hoodie till I come up with a better plan. But he might be too into his little love story to take a note”.

“Let's hope he is. The longer that keeps them busy the more I get to see you.” His words went with his hands that trailed up and down my back. He had been there on his bed since last night tangled up in his blankets. 

I closed my eyes and let my head lay on his shoulder. “I should start getting dressed, I tried to sneak away but He didn't let go of me, instead he kissed me deeply.

“Hercules,”I laughed breathlessly, “I have to. We have no idea when John could come back and if he saw us…” we had both agreed last night that no one needed to know about us. Alex and John were having their own issues and the girl gang I had heard so much about would definitely pounce on the gossip they found out. And then there was his cousin who he wanted to find the right time to tell. He said it was a personal thing. I didn't push it. 

“I'm sure they are lost in each other's eyes right now. We have time.”

I sighed, allowing myself another kiss. His lips were soft and when I pulled back I was lost in a bliss. I didn't have that crushing weight of loneliness hanging over me anymore and if this was what it felt to not have it then I would fight to never be alone again. 

“Maybe a few more minutes,” I smiled to which he pulled me closer. 

 

*John* 

Eyes are said to be the windows to the soul but right now they were just windows of pain. 

“Oh god,” Alex groaned. “I regret all the decisions.” he gave another heave and what sounded like a sob or a creative French curse. At this point, it was slurred together.

“Maybe if you didn't do a drink off with Thomas-”

“We call him bitch under this roof!” I snorted a laugh as another wave of nausea overtook him. I had been holding back his hair for an hour now watching him slowly sober up between swallows of water and vomit breaks. 

“I have never thrown up this much in my life,” he coughed, curling up on the floor next to the toilet. I took a seat on the tiled ground and gave him a water bottle. “I hate my life.”

“Then don't drink people under the table.” He sat up, cradling his head in his hands. 

“I just wanted to prove I was better than him. 

“Why?”

“His essays are all they talk about in my stupid class and-and his boyfriend was right there! What's worse than being embarrassed in front of your loved ones?”

“Embarrassing yourself in front of all your friends and so-called enemy?”

“I didn't do that-”

“You got drunk off three shots and nearly threw up downing the fourth.” 

“So that doesn't mean-”

“We were at the party for like five minutes and you called Laf some french words that made him blush. It was like ‘beau diable’ or something.”

Okay so I embarrassed myself but I won't next time.

“good. let your brain do the talking and don't destroy it.”

He frowned at me, his eyes dropping and dark bags under them. We had both been up since three am only four hours after going to sleep because he started throwing up and couldn't stop. With a rub of his eye, he leaned his head on my shoulder. “You sound like laf,” he mumbled. 

“Well, he does make the most sense.”

“aussi le plus ennuyeux,” whatever he said was a mix of affection and a bitter bite. I didn't ask for a translation but also couldn't as I heard a soft snore. He was fast asleep on my shoulder and I couldn't have asked for a better way to start my morning than to be so close to him. 

A flutter in my chest caught my attention and I tried to not let it all dawn on me too fast but…

I was in love, wasn't I? 

 

*Thomas*

In my dream, a monkey had my face. It watched me carefully making small sounds and clapping his hands. That had to be one of the weirdest things I ever dreamt of. The light of the world outside my dreams soon had me moving to block it all out. I woke mid-afternoon with a raging hangover so bad I couldn't, wouldn't, move my head. I shifted slowly, very very slowly trying to keep my head out of harm's way. 

I blinked my eyes once, then twice to clear away the blur and groggy feeling so I could try to figure out what to do next thankfully I had a guardian angel.

A hand softly laid itself on my bicep before I could roll off the edge of the bed in my disoriented haze. I blinked a few times and struggled to look at James who was washed in the afternoon light. Even hungover I still had to stop to admire how he looked. 

“Try not to move,” he whispered turning towards my nightstand. in a few quiet clicks of a bottle he held out three Advil pills to me. I took them gladly and swallowed them with a cup of water he handed me. I closed my eyes and laid there for a few seconds till the dark space behind my eyelids stopped swirling so fast. 

“Thanks, baby,” I croaked then cleared my throat to get rid of all the build up in it. 

He ran his fingers smoothly through my hair. “It's what I'm here for sweetheart.” The name made me sink deeper into a space of tired comfort even if I was hungover. He only used a nickname like that when he knew I needed it. I guess I looked pitiful. He got up to pull away from where he had been sitting on the edge of the bed. 

“No,” I whined catching his wrist gently for his and my own comfort. “Don't leave me!”

“I'm not he laughed. I'm going to go shut the curtain.” He gestured to the heavy black curtain that had been drawn back to let in light. “It was the only natural way to wake you up.” He passed me the water and went to do as he told me he would. 

Pushing myself up on my elbows I sat all the way up to take several swigs and greet him when he came to sit back down on the edge beside me.

“I'm glad you feel well enough to sit up. I was almost sure you had alcohol poisoning, again.” 

“Don't worry baby nothing is going to take me down, now can we just lay here while I die? Till Monday? “

I didn't need to see him to know that the ‘you're an idiot’ smile was on his face. “I would love nothing more.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so we will get back to the main story in the next one nut this was just a quick side note I wrote while I was sick and I am just now editing and uploading.


	9. We Think We Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the girl gang reunites, Hercules and laf share another moment and James gets hurt

*Alex*

I'll admit that I didn't want to go to the girl gang meeting that was slowly gaining male members. I didn't want to go but I did because John wanted me to and how could I say no.

Dolly, Sally, Martha, and Martha’s boyfriend, Charles Lee, were already there. The two older females were integrating Charles ruthlessly to the point where he looked happy to see us, just two strangers. 

“John!” Martha cheered. “You're here!”

“That makes two of the four. Now, where are the dorks,” Sally frowned.

“They must be dancing the tango,” Martha winked and nudged her. Sally rolled her eyes at the brightly dressed girl. “So John, who is the friend?”

“Right,” he smiled. “Girl gang meet Alex.”

“I would like to say I have heard nothing about you,”I joked as I sat down. “But sadly I have heard lots.”

“That is sad anddd looks like the dorks are here.” I turned in my seat to get a look at James in Thomas walking in. james was coughing and Thomas had a had on his back, both were breathing heavily. 

“Sorry-” James heaved. “Sorry, we're late.” They collapsed into their seats drinking the already ordered water in front of them.

“What's the excuse,” Dolly narrowed her eyes at James.

Thomas caught his breath. “Remember the goose at the pound across the street?”

“Vaguely,” Sally answered.

“Yeah well, James dared me-”

“I did no such thing,” the smaller of the two laughed leaning into his boyfriend as the larger one's hand went from is back to around his shoulders.

“Whatever. So James dared me I wouldn't throw a rock at it-”

“You threw a rock at a goose,” Martha snorted.

“It was a dare! I had to!”

“Have you been drinking lake water,” again sally grinned.

“Again,”I asked eyebrow raised. Jefferson glared at me quickly till a stern look from James broke him away.

“Now that really was a dare,” James smiled proudly. “He was drunk.”

“No surprise,” Dolly jabbed. She took a bite of her food

“Okay, okay. Now that you have all solved the mystery of why your crowned cutest couple was late-” that drew a groan from James- “why don't you introduce us to our competition?”

Martha sat up straighter. “This is Charles.” We all looked to him. He didn't smile just seemed to stare. He gave a puzzling look to Martha who gave a nervous smile to the rest of us. When their eyes were off him I saw him sneak a glance at Thomas and James. He was giving them a disgusted stare before he noticed me still paying attention.

“How did you meet,” Sally questioned leaning on her elbows. 

“Lunchroom. See he and I were both eating apple pie and he said “wow is that you're favorite” and I was like “wow it is-””

“And I was like “wow when will this story end,”” her sister teased.

“Dolly,” the younger whined. “Shut your stupid face.”

“What? I can do what I want.” Sally whispered something and Dolly hooted with laughter. 

“What,” Martha demanded

“Oh nothing,” Sally sang

“I hate both of you. Stop being so judgy”

“If you think this is bad you should have seen what they did to Burr and Theo when they first dated,” Thomas told her. “They ripped him to pieces.”

“You have to defend your people,” Dolly shrugged. “Just like how we questioned Thomas.”

“Even though we had been dating for almost two years by the time we met you,” James countered

“Is never too late to scare the shit out of a boyfriend. We did it for you and Theo and Martha and we will do it for John when he finally-”

“Hey dolly,” John broke through clenched teeth. “Do you like your tongue where it is?”

“Do you like your secrets where they are?”

“Yes.” 

“Then yes.”

“Did we make a deal then?”

“Looks like we did.”

“Good.”

“Good.”

“Fine,” John huffed 

“Awesome,” dolly shot back leaning in her chair

“What just happened,”I whispered to Martha

“I think they lost it,” she whispered back

“Definitely lost it,” James confirmed with a growing smile as the combined glare of Dolly and John concentrated on us. I grinned back at the freckled face boy. A part of me wanted to take his hand in mind from under the table, to kiss him but I resisted. 

\---

The night's events came to a close around ten when we had to all bail for classes in the morning. John and I walked together back to the dorms. I tried to pretend I wasn't standing so close but I was.

“Tonight was fun,” he smiled. His arm brushed mine and my stomach fluttered. 

“It was,” I agreed standing a little closer, I felt my hand touch his and a heat buzzed across my skin. If he felt put off by it he didn't show it. 

“I was wondering…”

“Wondering?”

“Um, well…” his cheeks were dusted with a light blush. He cleared his throat. “I need help with a class.” His words took my heart for a sudden turn. 

“What class?” I tied not to let myself sound deflated.

“Math. you're good at that right? What am I saying you're good at everything!" He rambled his steps had a bit of a bounce. "You're Alexander Hamilton! You're probably so good at it you have professors gawking at your talent.” He stopped himself. “Can you help me?”

“Totally” not. Totally not. Math was one of the few things I was admittedly bad at. I can help you. “How about we meet Wednesday in the library?” We stopped at the top of the staircase right before we had to part. 

“I'll see you in class tomorrow,” he smiled his eyes kept drifting down to his shoes like they had been the entire walk home

“Yeah, see you in class.” I wanted to kiss him. That's how all the movies did it. A kiss and a good night but I wouldn't pull it on him like that. “Good night,” I offered.

He looked up to meet my eyes with his soft brown ones. They were purer than any others I had ever seen. His smile made my heart tug. “Good night.” 

There we left it with me trying not to smile too bright when I got back to my empty room. That put a damper on my mood. Once again, for the fourth time in two weeks, my room was void of all life when I got back from seeing John. 

Laf had been acting strange, he did do the things he normally did. He stopped wearing tee-shirts and he often looked in pain. He was distracted and tired when he saw me and was never around and… it worried me. I would have to talk to him.

 

*Hercules*

Every sound in the world became dull to my ears after hearing what types of things I could draw out of the Frenchman whether it be moans or even his voice. He was on top of me his lips still on mine even with the struggle of getting my pants off.

“You can't be too loud, Putain,” he purred, hands roaming over my bare skin.

“Fuck, laf. Come on you've been teasing for an hour-” my own gasp cut me off as his nails scratched over the sensitive skin of my inner thigh. 

“Such a mouth,” he tisked. I felt him shift and scoot lower. His breath rolled over my length and I couldn't help but moan. My hips lifted on there own in a wordless plea that I refused to speak.

“You really do want everyone to know you're being fucked don't you?” He didn't wait for an answer, just took the head of my cock into my mouth. He had been taking me apart for an hour. Bit by bit in the back seat of my car because Alex and John would be back any moment. 

“Usually-oh god fuck-”I quivered my eyes screwed shut trying to get a straight sentence out. His flattened out over my tip and his head bobbed back down, again and again, pushing me closer and closer to the edge. I forced my mind to recollect, “Usu-usually car sex doesn't take this long.”

He replaced his mouth with his hand that moved over me painfully slow. “Well if someone hadn't of gotten hard on the walk back…”

“Your hand was on my ass!”

I could feel his grin on the skin of my stomach. “It was an accident also I did not see you complaining much at the time.” He sped up, faster and faster till I gave up all my remaining pride to buck up into the warmth. Desperate and he knew it. I was desperate for him, all of him, and he knew it. 

\---

He tried to catch our breaths as best we could in such a little space while still lying side by side. This was how it had been the last two weeks. Just the two of us desperate for each other. It wasn't the kiddy shit Alex and John had, it was raw and rough but we could both handle it. 

“You left another hickey on my neck,” he smirked running his thumb over it and tipping his head to the side to show it off in the dim street light outside.

“What can i say, I love the sounds you make when I do it.” I gripped his hip softly to pull him closer and press my lips to the mark. “Fucking beautiful,” I whispered

He shuddered. “It's like you want me to be hard all over again.”

“I wouldn't be opposed to it.” I proved it with another kiss, my hands tangled in his hair to deepen it. We pulled away and laid there drinking in the sounds of the night.

“Hercules,” he said finally. His voice was thick with sleep that matched the weight of my eyelids.

“Hm?”

He drew a pattern on my skin with the pad of his finger. “We have classes in five hours.”

“Fuck,” I laughed. “I guess we took longer than I thought.”

“Much longer but It was worth it to see you squirm.”

“I don't squirm Frenchman.” 

“You do and it is hot.” He kissed me again and sat up to pull back on his shirt and hoodie. He dug around a bit then handed me my own wrinkled grey shirt. 

“Is that so,” I gave him a wink. 

“Shut up,” with a peck on the check and a quick glance out the back window he was out and in the parking lot.

“See you in class tomorrow,” I asked with a sly smile.

“If you're not too sore to get up,” his eyes were mocking. One last kiss was all I got before he was walking away, hips swinging in another tease of his. 

I rolled my shoulders and waited a few minutes before heading in myself to find John with his arms crossed sitting on his bed.

“Wanna explain where you've been-”

“Nope.” I tapped him on his nose before he could say anything else. “And I don't have to so instead let's watch youtube and gossip about how amazing Alex’s hair looked tonight or something.”

He looked away and bit his lip. “I'll have you know it did look good and I will not be letting my questions go but gossip and youtube does sound fun.”

“Perfect.”

 

*James*

 

I should have known the second I laid eyes on Lee that he was bad news. He confronted me not long after the dinner at the diner. I was at the library with Sally and Dolly. Dolly was tapping her pencil on her open textbook, she took down notes on the side where Sally was doodling on hers out of total boredom. It was peaceful till the trio of asses emerged.

“Well hey there girls,” Lee greeted sauntering up with Seasbury and George “the king” King. the grin on all of their faces uneased me. I had a bad feeling about them I was about to tell the girls we should leave but they were already blocking the route through the shelves to the exit.

“And James,” Sally corrected still doodling on her paper. She slid it to Dolly and she giggled softly. 

“Sure,” King dismissed. “Mind if we have a seat?”

"Actually, we're trying to study," Dolly told them. 

“Oh,” Lee’s smile grew. “So are we.” 

“What is it that you're studying,”I asked. I locked eyes with him. 

“Scandals,”I only need the first word to know what was about to happen. My heart rate lept into a full gallop. “Immoral deeds. Acts of betrayal and or treachery. His eyes darkened. “Just to name a few.”

King took a seat on the edge of the table leaning on his arm to block my view of Sally across from me. “We just have a few questions for you Jemmy.”

“Don't call me that-”

“Does Thomas know you're using him?” Seabury cut me off.

“I don't know what you're talking about-”

“Don't lie,” Seabury spat from where he stood to my left keeping dolly away. “Charles told us about last night. You have one of the richest men in new york wrapped around your finger.”

“What's the deal then” lee pushed. “You get on your knees and he gives you cash? You make him look approachable and you get to warm his bed?”

“Shut up Charles,” Sally growled getting to her feet. 

“I can see why he likes you,” King teased. “I bet he likes little lap dogs. Quiet and easy to please. Easy to shut up.”

My heart stung as it pounded. I didn't handle confrontation well, not one bit. “Back off Lee,”I challenged. I got to my shaky legs.

“Little dog thinks he has a bite,” he shoved me with a snarl and grabbed my wrist so tight that it would bruise. “I want information bitch or I'll kick your ass black and blue.” 

“Fuck off,” I didn't have time to register his leg connecting with the back of mine and hip being slammed into the table.

“Bad fucking choice,” King cawed keeping sally back who raised her fist to punch.

“What's wrong dog? Can't fight your own battles? Can't pay your own bills? Fucking worthless. You're a little snake aren't you?”

“And you will be very dead if you say another word.”

The trio all turned to face Alex. his eyes blazed with fury, his fists as clenched as his jaw. 

“We didn't say anything short fry.” Lee and the others took a few steps back, not out of fear but of cockiness. “We were just here to ask something about my girlfriend.”. 

“Leave. Or I'll call someone who will make you.”

“Oho king mocked. Fisty aren't you. We don't want to stick around boys. Let's go.” They followed king out the way they came. 

“Are you guys alright,” Alex asked. He was rigid still glancing the way they left.

“Were fine,” Dolly answered. “James?”

I shook my head to wake myself out of the heart-pounding daze. “Yeah,” it came out as a mumble.

“Good. I'm telling Martha right now to dump that asshole. My god how could I not have seen that-”

“Last night,” Alex spoke up. “He kept staring at you and Jefferson.”

“He must have thought he could blackmail him,” Dolly sighed. 

“Yeah. 

Dolly’s eyebrows knitted with worry. “James you don't seem alright.”

“I am. I am good.”

“You need to tell Thomas-”

“No. no. no and no. we do not tell him.” I looked each one in the eye from where I sat while they stood around me. I don't remember sitting down. “I don't even want to think of what trouble that idiot would get himself into if he knew. No one tells him. Got it?”

“Sure,” they all mumbled exchanging glances. 

“Good. good. See? This is good. Let's just go back to studying." They slowly all sat down even Alex with a math book in his hands. 

“Math,” I asked trying to distract myself from the sting from my hip and the dark ring of bruises already forming on my wrist. “Are you looking at it for a class?” I was easing the mood towards a lighter conversation.

“No,” he said eyes still fixed with concern. “It's to tutor someone.” 

“I can help you,” I offered

“Plase,” he broke. “because my future relationship rests on me knowing this by tomorrow.”

“Pressure math. My favorite.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please leave a kudos if you enjoyed and comments make my day!


	10. I could totally be Batman

*Thomas*

“In what universe is spiderman better than Batman?” I gave Burr a sideways glance, then pressed the brown cloudy bottle to my lips. 

“All of them,” Aaron folded his arms. “He has superpowers.” We have had the argument a few times, we never reached an agreement.

I sat the bottle back down next to his on the rough material of the tailgate. “I mean kinda, but Batman has money and weapons. Not to mention an entire family to back him up.”

He snorted, “you could totally be Batman.” 

My grin broadened, “Shit man, we just need to murder my dad.”

“I have a shovel in my car.” he gave me a shrug for thought and drank some of his own beer. 

“Why,”I laughed, my head thrown back. “You have an apartment, why on earth would you need a shovel?”

“Theo wanted to volunteer at some building site. They needed a shovel. 

“Sure, murderer. We can do the job while I'm at that stupid meeting Friday.”

“I forgot about that.”

“I wish I could forget but that's not easy with my dad.”

“Just smile and nod, it will be over quickly.”

“Fuck I hope so. I had to memorize lines and shit. He's making me wear a suit! God, sometimes I wish he would just keel over.”

“At Least you'll get to see Peter,” he pointed out. He always found the silver lining. Too bad I always took the silver lining and choked it out.

“That is a plus, I swear to fuck if my pops been mistreating him-” 

“You're working yourself up again.” I huffed out a breath and sat back a bit. I could feel myself growing more and more restless as the time got closer. That's how we ended up at a Denny's in the first place and now some green ass park.

“Yeah, what's new.” I stood up to stretch my arms. The tailgate of his truck made my butt numb enough to not feel it anymore. “Hows Theo?” I was a master at changing the subject.

He knew what I was doing but still rolled with it. “She's doing great. She's hungry all the time but that's normal... I guess.” He twisted his hands in his lap.

“Hey, Don't worry so much Aaron.” I put a hand gently on his shoulder. “You're going to be a great dad.”

“Thanks, Thomas.” He smiled, “Theo keeps telling me the same thing.”

“It's ‘caue it's true. Maybe you should like go to yoga.”

“Yoga?” He frowned at me, but his lips still softly twitched into a slight smile.

“Hell yeah, hot yoga. It's supposed to be like a stress reliever or some shit.”

“I will shoot myself if I ever end up at hot yoga.”

“Fuckin’ same.” I slammed down the rest of my drink. 

“Then why did you suggest it?”

“It's like right up your alley. You're a loser, it's something losers do.”

“You're the reason I contemplate death.” he shoved me slightly with his foot.

“Aww, thanks A-aron.” I put my hand playfully on my heart.

“I swear,” he shook his head and grinned up at the stars. “It's late.”

“Very,”I agreed. “We should head back.”

“Probably. We both have people to see.” he finished his bottle with a large swallow. 

“Theo and James,”I mused and too looked to the stars. “Do you ever think about how lucky we are?”

“All the time. God all the time. Sometimes I stop and realize, “I have a fiance, I have a family on the way.”

“You're doing great Aaron. We both are.” I patted his back. “We should head home to those great things.”

He nodded his head. “I'm down.”

*James*

I held it together for three more hours through Hamiltons questions and Dolly’s looks. I made it back to the silent dorm. I was thankful that is was empty because even though I wanted nothing more than to lay down next to the love of my life I couldn't let him know something was wrong. 

My legs shook at the knees and I wrapped my arms around my middle to hold it together. Hold it together. Hold it… 

Tears fell before I could bite them back. They rolled down my cheeks and stung my eyes. I whipped them away quickly and blinked them back. He would know I had been crying. He always knew. God, I hoped he noticed and at the same time I didn't. I never made a big deal of this things when they happened. I was always quiet and easy...like a lap dog. 

I was just as they had said. Easy. I was worthless. I was nothing compared to someone like Thomas. I felt the tears come back and this time I didn't stop them. I tried to think to what time he would be back. 

It was seven p.m on a Tuesday night. He would either be at a study group or get dinner with Aaron. Whichever one it was I had time. Time to lock myself in the bathroom and sit in the dark on the floor to cry in peace. That's where I stayed for a while. I lost track of the time but time didn't really matter, it never mattered. I didn't move from the floor till I heard the door open. 

I held my breath to bring it all back, the world, my heart rate, my mind. “baby?” I could hear him set down a bag, I could picture him looking around, rolling his shoulders. Everything I was accustomed to. Everything that was him.

“In the bathroom,” I answered. I gently touched the brass colored doorknob. 

“Are you okay?”

I made myself laugh. “I'm fine,” I checked my face in the mirror, it was a challenge in the dark. The tears were dry, my eyes looked normal. I opened the door to his grin. His smiles...god his smiles...fuck, his smiles. I didn't deserve it. I didn't deserve him. Just like they said...

That grin slowly dropped. “You've been crying?” He asks it like a question like he wasn't certain. Or more like he was certain but didn't want to push. 

I didn't deserve him. I didn't deserve that kindness. 

I didn't know if he pulled me to him or if I hugged him first but either way I was quickly wrapped up in his arms again by face buried into his chest. I was crying. That was for sure. 

“What happened baby?” he was so fucking worried.

“Nothing,” I sniffled. “Nothing happened.” 

His arms tightened around me. “You can tell me.”

“I know,” I laughed nervously. I pulled away to save a little face but I didn't have to. I never have to with him. He whipped away my tear with his thumb. 

“It's alright,” he hushed. That only made me cry harder. “Oh baby,” he sighed pulling me to him again. I needed it, he always knew what I needed. Why was he with me? I was a nobody with heart problems and anxiety. Why, why the fuck was an heir to a business standing in front of me calling me pet names? Why did he love me? Why? 

“How can I help?” The voice I've heard tell people off and debate in courts with a roar like a lion's was whispering to me. 

“Promise?”

“Promise what darlin’?”

“Promise that you love me?” 

“I promise. God James,” my name on his lips sent jolts down my spine. “You are everything I am, you have everything I am. I promise that I love you more than anything.” 

“Thank you,” I sniffled. I tried to follow his breathing patterns till our heartbeats were the same.

“No, thank you.” He held me close. I felt a tremble in his hands. “Do you want to take a nap?” 

I stifled a yawn at the mention. I was exhausted, It was late. “A nap sounds good.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it took so long for me to update. writer's block is a bitch!

**Author's Note:**

> this is the one with more heart, this is the idea I had. so this started off showing some point of views and some smut. I normally don't write smut but hey Jefferson has a lot of sex. I hope you guys like this new idea.


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